No. 1 Ohio State rolled into Blacksburg last Monday and disposed of a feisty Virginia Tech team, 42-24.
It was far from perfect, but the Buckeyes provided enough highlights to swoon the country and let it be known they were serious about defending their title.
Meanwhile, in the part of the country that's never relevant outside of football season, millionaire SEC coaches used their soapboxes to speak on a matter close to their hearts — Ohio State's football schedule.
South Carolina's Steve Spurrier — the has-been, loose-mouthed uncle we've all come to know and love — was the first SEC coach to fire a shot across Ohio State's bow during an appearance on Paul Finebaum's clown rodeo:
That face when you lose to Kentucky at home.
“Every now and then when I listen in to your show, I know the SEC fans are a little upset at Ohio State’s schedule, and rightfully so to tell you the truth," Spurrier crooned into the SEC's largest propaganda arm.
Big words, but in HBC's defense: The 'Cocks were coming off an opening-weekend victory over mighty North Carolina. (Victories like that don't grow on trees in South Carolina.)
To his point about the SEC gauntlet, the Head Ball Coach got caught slipping Saturday night when Kentucky — yes, Kentucky actually has a football team — dropped into Williams-Brice Stadium and hung a 26-22 L on the Gamecocks.
It dropped the HBC to 85-46 at South Carolina. There aren't enough witty one-liners in the world to rescue a man from that mediocre mire.
Arkansas' Bert Bielema — owner of a 1-5 record against Ohio State and easily the most-detested head coach among Big Ten Fans — picked up the meme and ran waddled with it.
“I spent a lot of time in that other conference,” Bielema said of the Big Ten. “Ohio State’s ranked No. 1 and they have one game remaining on their schedule that has anybody ranked right now — Michigan State. We’re going to play eight straight opponents that are ranked.”
Bert got all wound up by putting Ohio State's name in his mouth that he forgot to properly peruse his schedule.
The Toledo Rockets — which, in defense to Bert, were unranked — stymied Arkansas on Saturday night, 16-12.
There is only one thing that can settle that:
This time last year, Dan Mullen was at the head of one of the hottest teams in America: The Mississippi State Bulldogs. Of course, a lot can change in a year.
After his Bulldogs dispatched the mighty Golden Eagles of Southern Mississippi, 36-16, in Week 1, Urban Meyer's former righthand man turned his attention to his team's trip to Baton Rouge.
—Wait.... what in the Hell am I even talking about? He pile-jumped Ohio State's schedule.
“I think all the talk, you kept hearing things in the offseason, ‘the SEC has lost its luster, lost its power and other leagues are catching up,’ I don’t know that that’s the case. I think what’s always made this league special is the depth of the league. I think the top teams, you look around the country at the top teams in every conference, (they) can play with everybody in the SEC. But what you’re talking about now is…I guess we’re in at No. 25. We’re the 10th-ranked team in our conference and we’re No. 25 in the nation, that’s pretty good. You’re not going to see that anywhere else. Week in and week out, that’s what makes it a tough schedule. You look at the top teams in the Big Ten, they’re playing one ranked team a year. They’re getting a lot of time to roll in younger players, the opportunity to stay healthy for most of the year, (and) really get motivated for that one big game. Here in the SEC – the West this year, everybody is ranked – every single week you gotta bring your A-game.”
“I look at (ESPN’s) FPI, Ohio State has a 99 percent chance to win their games. What’s interesting is how that would rank for each team in the SEC West off of (Ohio State’s) schedule – how many of those (SEC West) teams would be looked as locks for the playoff just in the West if that was the schedule that our teams had to play, and what (Ohio State’s) percentage would be if they were playing one of our schedules.”
Dan Mullen really said that like the championship runs through Starkville.
Unfortunately for the cow bell degenerates, the Bulldogs' title hopes were dealt a critical blow on Saturday night as divisional rival LSU put them down, 21-19.
Perhaps — and I'm just spitballing here — but perhaps these coaches would be wise to stop spending valuable time wringing their hands over Ohio State's schedule. (What would they have the Buckeyes do about it anyway? It's unclear.)
Because none of these coaches have won a conference title for their schools and they're starting off from behind the 8-ball in 2015 already.
Ohio State (2-0) is onto the next one; the Buckeyes host the Huskies of Northern Illinois, next Saturday at 3:30 p.m.
SEC coaches won't have anything smart to say about that either.
