The symbol of the Hurricanes is...a duck?This is the third and final installment in a series that is threatening to live up to its own name. I had no intention of continuing to beat this drum but the enthusiastic reaction to the first two posts in the series combined with the numerous pet peeves that surface in my mind during the course of a typical season have inspired me to lay out one more category of frequent disdain: team mascots.
I was watching television with my wife the other day and on the screen flashed before us the image that you see to the right. She asked me what it was and I answered that it was the mascot of the Miami Hurricanes. Then she asked the question that should be asked by anyone who plays for or supports "the U": what does a duck have to do with Hurricanes? Since I did not know the answer, I did some research and found that the mascot is supposed to be an Ibis. The Ibis is (according to folklore) the last animal to flee from an approaching hurricane and the first to reappear after it passes. The official name of the mascot is "Sebastion the Ibis", but he sure looks like a duck to me. I guess the snarling bill of a duck is more imposing than the downward-pointing bill of an Ibis.
In any case, having lived through the Jimmy Johnson years and all of the hype surrounding the 2002 Miami team, I've pretty much had my fill of old Sebastion. But maybe there's a mascot that gets on your nerves even more? I'm going to suggest a few candidates below and organize them into three different mascot categories. Hopefully, I'll cover the one that suits your annoyance the most, but if not then please share your disdain in the comments.
DRESSED UP HUMAN MASCOTS
Notre Dame probably leads the pack in this category. Their Leprechaun mascot is the epitome of impotent posturing, considering what their teams have accomplished on the field of late. But with the hiring of Brian Kelly and the prospect that ND might once again rise to prominence, it is likely that the Leprechaun will be strutting with a little more pride than he has in the past few seasons. Still, I can't help but chuckle when I see this suggestion for a new mascot (obviously a jab at former coach Weis but hilarious nonetheless).
I've always thought Florida State mascot Chief Osceola was pretty cool, with his war paint and flaming spear. The fact that he has successfully fought off the NCAA's ban on "hostile and abusive" mascots (hello Illinois fans!) is also a plus. But that's only because the program has been humbled by scandal and lack of football success in the past few seasons. As with Notre Dame, if the coaching change (Bowden out, Fisher in) brings the 'Noles back to the top of the college ranks, then the Chief might start to really irritate.
The horse, not the man.LIVE ANIMAL MASCOTS
There are many of these, but the one that annoys me the most is USC's "Traveler". Apparently it's only the horse that is considered an official mascot, although the rider (sometimes erroneously referred to as "Tommy Trojan") is more indicative of the "Trojan" label. Traveler might be humbled a bit this season, considering the NCAA sanctions and what not. But I don't think it will make him any less irritating in the long run.
Another one that sometimes rankles me is "Uga", the English Bulldog that serves as the mascot for the University of Georgia. Besides the silly name, the fact that the death of one of these pooches makes for a "serious" news story in Atlanta's biggest paper tells you all about priorities down yonder in Athens. Another live animal mascot that sometimes irritates is "Ralphie", the live Buffalo used by the University of Colorado to lead their team onto the field at the beginning of the game and the beginning of the second half. Like Uga has "Hairy Dawg", Ralphie has a costumed-human equivalent, but besides getting love from the Capital One Mascot Challenge, "Chip" doesn't get much camera time compared to Ralphie.
COSTUMED-HUMAN MASCOTS
Where do we start in this category? They say that familiarity breeds contempt, and some of the most familiar costumed mascots to Buckeye fans are the ones representing Big Ten rivals like Wisconsin, Michigan State, and Purdue. While these all have their moments, the one that probably annoys Ohio State fans the most is Penn State's "Nittany Lion" (pretty original, eh?). Of course, there's nothing more annoying than that lion roar that they blast from the stadium speakers, but the Nittany Lion is a close second. He is second to none in terms of silly antics and posturing. That being said, I'm sure the PSU fans have an equal amount of contempt for our beloved Brutus Buckeye, but at least he has a name.
Wait a minute. It seems I've left out OSU's biggest rival. Do they have a mascot? Apparently not. Or at least, not anymore. But perhaps someday they could convince this guy to prowl their sideline and inspire the team to feats of great strength and courage? If not, these guys might have to suffice for now.
Now it's your turn: which mascot is the most annoying? Have I left out any that should have been mentioned? As always, try to use proper decorum but do not hesitate to pour contempt where it is deserved.
