You may find that work, school, or other obligations keep you from focusing on Twitter the way you should. Thankfully for you, I'm able to tune out those distractions and provide you with a weekly rundown of the best tweets from around campus.
I am alive. I was not killed by The Great Daryl Jackson Byrnes (totally not what D.J. stands for, but we'll run with it). I did in fact drop my work on his "desk" last week and demand that it be done, but I was not killed. Perhaps he is far more merciful than he lets on, or maybe that was just his way of telling me "happy birthday." But more than likely, he just didn't want to have to do my job every week. Killing me would have been more of an inconvenience than allowing me to live.
So here I am. I'm sorry to say you have to read my poor commentary yet again, but at least it comes with :fire emoji: Tweets!
Had fun shooting each other today. We finally found a sport were good at! pic.twitter.com/C452r78UKb
— OSU Specialists (@BuckSpecialists) July 12, 2015
It's official NIKE! #JustDoIt
— D'Angelo Russell (@Dloading) July 17, 2015
I WILL be purchasing the DAR1s whenever they're released.
People from Ohio stick out in Jacksonville. We're the only ones without our windows tinted yet
— Mike (@mike63bennett) July 14, 2015
I have to get my wisdom tooth pull Friday any advice?
— Torrance Gibson 6 (@quick_tg6) July 15, 2015
Honestly, getting my wisdom teeth pulled was awesome. The couple of days afterward were some of the best days ever. I just slept, ate ice cream, and watched shark week. I don't understand why people think it sucks.
I wish I was a billionaire solely so I could hire someone specifically for getting me peanut m&m's whenever I want them.
— Mike (@mike63bennett) July 16, 2015
Fine. I'll go get the damn candy myself
— Mike (@mike63bennett) July 16, 2015
Moes has the best salsa in the world
— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) July 16, 2015
Stephen probably shouldn't let 12 find out he cheated on Chipotle' while he was in L.A.
Want to have a former Buckeye head coach a current #Buckeyes assistant pour you a drink? Double Comfort on High St. pic.twitter.com/qbXraZR5Fj
— Jeremy Birmingham (@Birm) July 14, 2015
@CoachZachSmith ....i see pantoni dressed u this morning w them plaid shorts on.... https://t.co/vmUtLS0LQK
— Noah Brown (@Nb_Eight0) July 14, 2015
When your computer restarts as you're finishing your five page essay.... And you didn't save #SaveAsYouType pic.twitter.com/0ay6CZ2nMP
— Liam McCullough (@LiamMcCullough2) July 13, 2015
Yo Liam, Microsoft Word autosaves and recovers those documents for you. This isn't 1998. Everything's gonna be fine.
Typed in lyrics to a rap song I didn't know and 10 different songs popped up... Maybe we should start talking about different stuff
— Mike (@mike63bennett) July 14, 2015
@jburgs37 no it was that semi old one about drugs and alcohol. You know the one.
— Mike (@mike63bennett) July 14, 2015
What about the country song about the truck, the girl, and the beer? Goes both ways. Ppl forget that.
HA! pic.twitter.com/uvoUrfzUZE
— Joey Bosa (@jbbigbear) July 10, 2015
Sooooo, before the rumors start, this is our DAUGHTER, Gigi, w urban. And that's all. #gavehermyticket #goGigi pic.twitter.com/svfikzk0uv
— Shelley Meyer (@spinnershells) July 16, 2015
#BringStephenColdStoneToYounkin
— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) July 15, 2015
#StephenCollierAttendedTheKerryCoombsHashtagAcademy
.... pic.twitter.com/YzjPHorqEm
— JaQuan Lyle (@JMamba13) July 14, 2015
Stat: We are currently exactly 6 months away from OSU's 2014 national championship victory and OSU's 2015 national championship victory.
— The Fake Lantern (@TheFakeLantern) July 12, 2015
So how didn't Ohio State not win the Capital Cup smh #SleepingOnUs foreal
— Trevor Thompson (@TrevBallinTrey2) July 16, 2015
Shoot we won like 5 National Championships
— Trevor Thompson (@TrevBallinTrey2) July 16, 2015
I'm one of probably four people who actually fully understands how the Capital One Cup rankings are determined and I'm even still upset about this.
happy (not) birthday, stephen!
Happy Birthday shoutout to @S13Collier pic.twitter.com/XVI6hdqSBw
— Mark Pantoni (@markpantoni) July 12, 2015
Bruh.......................................................... https://t.co/NkTYkN5ZWS
— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) July 12, 2015
@RevSGCollier lol I can't reveal my sources
— Mark Pantoni (@markpantoni) July 12, 2015
Ayyyy Pantoni learning from us.
@markpantoni @S13Collier Jokes on you too. Check the records on the actual B-day!
— Natalie Collier (@BossLadyN) July 12, 2015
But yall it's not even my birthday, Facebook has it wrong for some reason.
— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) July 12, 2015
Except we like to confirm things before we throw it on the interwebs to be ridiculed and mocked... Amateur move Pantoni.
Happy Birthday shoutout to @jbbigbear pic.twitter.com/8kZwh1zJ3N
— Mark Pantoni (@markpantoni) July 11, 2015
Although to his credit, he did get it right later in the week. Joey Bosa looks far less dangerous when he's this size. Maybe the key to blocking his is a time machine?
players attend espys
Full disclosure: it was really hard to make this section not 100% about Cardale Jones.
@Bokchoi24 I think it was lost in the mail! plus thought I would give some other guys some publicity #goodbloke
— Cameron Johnston (@Cam_Johnston) July 16, 2015
#goodbloke might be my new go-to hashtag.
LA here we come, #ESPYS @BraxtonMiller5 @EzekielElliott @RIP_JEP
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 14, 2015
Car12 Jones @CJ12_ @BraxtonMiller5 pic.twitter.com/AlONRYxvor
— EzekielElliott#15 (@EzekielElliott) July 14, 2015
WELL. Certainly no impermissible benefits there. That is not a lot of room and that is not a short flight.
This is a long flight
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
Cardale confirms. Not a short flight.
Jerry about to pass out
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 15, 2015
Someone needed to film Jerry Emig dealing with Cardale Jones throughout this trip. You could have made a movie: Planes Tranes and Automobiles pt. 2 (Ramzy made that joke and I'm repeating it because I was proud that I got the reference).
Theirs no hiding from me pic.twitter.com/MFXrtlmpLw
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 15, 2015
Chipotle so good man
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 15, 2015
Out of all the amazing places to eat in L.A. Cardale chose Chipotle... We know one thing, Dolodale is loyal. (Also, I'm not one to talk. I ate TGI Fridays and Applebees in Dallas).
It Never Rains In Southern California!
— Joshua Edward Perry (@RIP_JEP) July 14, 2015
What he means is, "the two days we were in Southern California, it didn't rain."
ESPYS SWAGG pic.twitter.com/60bHlbfYtm
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 15, 2015
Salute to our student-athletes at @ESPYS L-R @CJ12_ @BraxtonMiller5 @_LogieBear_ @EzekielElliott @RIP_JEP #GoBucks pic.twitter.com/9N9JIb4MEk
— Ohio State Buckeyes (@OhioStAthletics) July 15, 2015
Between these guys there are six national championships.
Crop top suit for the red carpet tonight
— EzekielElliott#15 (@EzekielElliott) July 15, 2015
Beware the salmon
— EzekielElliott#15 (@EzekielElliott) July 15, 2015
Hold on! Wait a min! My first L in college comes from a FEMALE!! LMAO Jp, congrats again to Mo'ne Davis, HUGE FAN
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
Congrats to Ms Mo'ne Davis for winning best breakthrough athlete pic.twitter.com/GArxoEuC9Z
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
Aaaaand now it gets fun.
Is it weird that I have a crush on @RondaRousey and scared of her at the same time
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
Soooooooo @RondaRousey what you doing after the show?
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
@CJ12_ @RondaRousey omg @1Tyvis get your son! He ain't ready!!!!!
— candice (@candicenbc4) July 16, 2015
Ms. Lee decided dad needed to hear about this.
@RondaRousey but if you already talking to a UFC fighter I'm cool
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
Sensing defeat, Cardale moved on...
@KendallJenner heard you here? What section?
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
@CJ12_ @TimShoemaker @KendallJenner time for u to go to bed! Way past your bedtime!!
— Stacy Barrett (@StacyB42) July 16, 2015
And Ms. Barrett was all over that one.
Lol let me stop joking before @TMZ start spreading rumors about me and @KendallJenner or @RondaRousey
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
My favorite part of all of this is he's sitting within feet of Urban while sending these Tweets. Also, ICYMI, Ronda Rousey did actually respond to Cardale Jones.
BTW even tho I didn't win Best Breakthrough Athlete, thanks everyone for the vote and support, Go Bucks
— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) July 16, 2015
#EatTheConfettiLikeGroceries pic.twitter.com/K3xoOoaVcb
— EzekielElliott#15 (@EzekielElliott) July 16, 2015
This week's winner of twitter
THIS JUST IN: Pat Elflein named to the Crete Award watch list, awarded to the nation's best right guard with the best metabolism @elflein65
— Taylor Decker (@TDeck68) July 14, 2015
It makes me happy that these guys are veteran enough to make fun of meaningless preseason watch lists instead being stoked to see their name on something.
Follow Friday:
- Liam McCullough @LiamMcCullough2
- Jeff Svoboda @JeffSvoboda Jeff is one of the best Buckeye sports writers in the business. He's spectacular in his football coverage, but what sets him apart is his knowledge and coverage of non-revenue sports at Ohio State. He doesn't just begrudgingly cover those sports because it's his job, he is passionate about them and it shows in his writing.
