Free #lifehack: Don't associate with any man who doesn't enjoy the mellow vibes of Tupac Shakur (RIP).
In fact, since Monday is the most callous of days... let us begin with a sermon from Bishop Shakur (RIP):
My soul (RIP) is now cleansed.
OHIO STATE DRAWS SEC COMPARISONS. We begin today with the gravest of news, folks: Today is not January 1st, 2015. (Also: last night was not the longest night in Earth's history.)
In a few days, we will be drinking from the top shelf of life on the day our favorite gang of student-athletes takes on Alabama's most talented amateur football team. O! the football that will be had!
Until then, however, we must subsist by getting dusted on Grandma's insulin.
From Marq Burnett of AnnistonTimes.com:
“They’ve got athletes all over the field, good quarterback, good running backs, too,” Tide cornerback Cyrus Jones said. “Just like the teams we play in our league (Southeastern Conference), just got to account for everything they like to do and be prepared to try and stop it the best you can.”
[...]
Ask who Ohio State reminds him of, Tide defensive end Jonathan Allen said the Buckeyes’ offense is similar to Mississippi State. Mississippi State coach Dan Mullen was the offensive coordinator at Florida when Ohio State’s Urban Meyer was the head coach for the Gators.
[...]
“[Cardale Jones is] definitely a big guy. Someone who likes to run with the ball,” Allen said. “They like to run with the quarterback. That’s something we’re really going to have to focus on is tackling. He’s a powerful guy, but can still throw the ball. So he’s a really good dual-threat quarterback.”
Say what you will: Mississippi State only lost to Alabama by five when the final whistle blew. But given Alabama featured the vaunted "game control" against the Bulldogs, I assume Alabama will attack Ohio State in similar fashion.
Granted, Ohio State doesn't play in the NFC South SEC West, but I'd like to think the Buckeyes are a more robust version of Mississippi State. Couple that with the fact Alabama won't be playing at home, and you begin to see why I'm higher on Ohio State's chances than most.
THOMPSON'S KNEE DOES A BAD (AGAIN). Here's your daily reminder that human bodies are decaying heaps of intergalactic garbage:
Thompson, for those unfamiliar, is the talented true freshman defensive lineman from Illinois who had originally fractured his kneecap in April. (No, I don't want to think about what it is to "fracture a kneecap" either.)
THE BOUNTIFUL ASH-FICKELL MARRIAGE. Here's something that makes you think: I've noticed a lot less "FIRE FICKELL" threads on 11W's forums this year.
From Tim May of The Columbus Dispatch:
Meyer wanted the defense fixed, and he wanted it done in a team-like fashion. Safeties coach and co-coordinator Everett Withers had conveniently left to become head coach at James Madison. Defensive line coach Mike Vrabel leaped to the NFL’s Houston Texans. With Fickell and cornerbacks coach Kerry Coombs still in the room, Meyer hired Larry Johnson away from Penn State to coach the line, and he brought in Ash to do the redesign, with brushstrokes from all.
“Like on offense right now, we have two coordinators — Ed Warinner, Tom Herman — and myself. It’s not one guy calling plays. That’s not the way we do business,” Meyer said. “We script each play, everybody is involved in game-planning. … I don’t want that dictator in there.
“Same thing on defense. … The best I’ve ever been around” share the work and the planning, “and that’s why I think we’re doing so well on defense now. There’s four good coaches in that room, and obviously the players are being developed.”
(Ash, for those that missed it, reportedly interviewed for the Colorado State vacancy over the weekend; so the resurrection he's led in Columbus hasn't gone unnoticed in foreign realms.)
But while we're on it: Poor former interim head coach Luke Fickell. Last year he caught all the heat, and now this year Chris Ash is getting all the credit.
I've been saying if Ohio State's defense plays like it did against Wisconsin... the Buckeyes won't be touched by 14 points by either team it'd face in the playoffs; third-string quarterback be damned.
And if that happens, I assume Luke Fickell will eschew pants next year. (He'll have earned that right, too.)
PLAYOFF UNIS COMETH. We already knew Nike was producing four billboards for its nationally-televised ad campaign. But here is a look at the white jerseys Ohio State will actually wear against Alabama:
Who's in? They're in. @AlabamaFTBL @WinTheDay @FSU_Football @OhioStAthletics #CFBPlayoff pic.twitter.com/mxFcsOsiZ4
— CFB Playoff (@CFBPlayoff) December 20, 2014
These need to replace current unis. RT @Landgrant33: Ohio State's playoff uniforms pic.twitter.com/vmutVKSJAB
— Dustin Fox (@DustinFox37) December 21, 2014
(I have yet to hear hear any old school crank complain about these alternate "uniformZ.")
CARDALE ALMOST WALKED AWAY. So, let's assume Cardale Jones had indeed left Ohio State. It'd be "Quarterback Jalin Marshall" right?
From Tony Gerdeman of TheOzone.net:
"I was almost out of here," Jones said back in April. "The growing up process was helpful and it came from the coaches believing in me and they kept on pushing me."
Almost out of Ohio State? How close was he, you ask?
"Very close. We had a sit down with my family to talk about what they expected of me and what I wasn't doing. So for me to become a quarterback that they feel like I should be, I wasn't meeting those standards at that point in time."
Cardale Jones going from the precipice of washing out to potential playoffs MVP is a pertinent reminder of one of the few codes I keep in life (NSFW): "Shawty, you never know."
SABAN ON SECOND CHANCES. Backstory: Alabama defensive end D.J. Pettway was kicked off the Alabama football team until he wasn't.
(Do not watch unless you want to like Nick Saban more than you presently do.)
From Drew Champlin of Al.com:
This moment was brought to you by Coca-Cola the sugar water drink© and DaSani the tap water drink©... and AT&T the phone monopoly™. (Boy, nothing puts steel in my knickers quicker than #brands™ organically appearing in the media I consume.)
OSU COPS OWN MICHIGAN REAL GOOD. Ohio State cops don't give a damn about your weak-ass misdemeanor trespassing charges, Michigan!!!!
OSU Public Safety Buckeyes and friend infiltrate the locker room during the Big10 Police Chiefs conference. Go Bucks! pic.twitter.com/lVEfJ9Dm0R
— OSU Police (@OSUPOLICE) December 9, 2014
THOSE WMDs. Yeah, I would party with these two dudes... Why isn't there an apostrophe in "Tim Hortons"?... Adam Johnson with the smoothest Sky Sports walk-up... Agreed: This is the worst Vine... #MichiganAthleticsTwitter: The gift that keeps on giving... BENTEKE!!!
