Nick Saban made some offhanded comments Tuesday about satellite camps, and in response Jim Harbaugh loaded buckshot into his Twitter account and blasted the Alabama HC:
"Amazing" to me- Alabama broke NCAA rules & now their HC is lecturing us on the possibility of rules being broken at camps. Truly "amazing."
— Coach Harbaugh (@CoachJim4UM) June 1, 2016
It's a shame Harbaugh will never get that Sugar Bowl swing at Alabama. His face would melt like a Ken doll in a microwave as the Wolverines trailed 49-3 late in the fourth quarter of a nationally televised semifinal game.
It's hilarious watching Michigan fans talk themselves into these antics. If Urban Meyer tweeted something like that back when Brady Hoke was the toast of Ann Arbor's shit-rack of "downtown" bars (no disrespect to Scorekeepers, which is good) a wave of Michigan fans would've overdosed on self-righteous smugness while railing against Meyer's "lack of class" on message boards.
In their heart, they know this crazy man won't lead them to the promised land.
BAD NEWS FOR SMITH'S DEFENSE TEAM. The case against Cardell Hayes, the admitted shooter of Will Smith, continues to weave its way through the Louisiana justice system.
At the center of the case is whether Hayes acted in self-defense when he shot Smith and his wife in early April. Videotape appeared to show Smith's SUV rear-end Hayes' Hummer before fleeing the scene. Hayes pursued Smith (and may have rear-ended Smith's SUV in return) before the fatal altercation occurred.
Hayes' defense is Smith was the first to threaten the use of a gun. When Smith turned his back, Hayes took the threat literally and fired eight times in self-defense.
Louisiana is a Stand-Your-Ground state too, meaning Hayes only needed to feel his life was in danger (and was not required to retreat) for it to be a self-defense shooting. A loaded 9-mm handgun belonging to Smith was found in the car, but there was no evidence it had been shot. The FBI, however, is investigating claims of crooked police work.
Hayes faces murder and attempted murder charges, among other felonies. If convicted of the murder, he'll die in prison.
On Tuesday, however, evidence that can only weaken the prosecution's case came to light.
From nola.com:
Will Smith's blood alcohol level was severely over the legal limit when the former Saints defensive end was shot and killed in April during a confrontation in the Lower Garden District, two sources with knowledge of the investigation told NOLA.com | The Times-Picayune.
One source said toxicology results, which have yet to be made public, put Smith's blood alcohol content at 0.24 percent, three times Louisiana's legal limit of 0.08 percent. The two sources discussed the report on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to speak publicly.
Peter Thomson, an attorney for the Smith family, did not immediately return messages Tuesday (May 31) seeking comment on the toxicology results. Thomson has said previously that Will Smith, who was driving before the fatal altercation, was not "inebriated to the point" of being unable to drive.
Smith didn't deserve to die because he was driving drunk, but you can bet your Twitter Law Degree Hayes' defense team will use this as the root cause of a fender-bender that turned into a double-shooting scene. Hayes, they'll argue, was simply the guy trying to track down a hit-and-skipper.
Salute to the Americans that will shoulder the responsibility of jury duty. It's going to be messy, and people will be outraged regardless of their verdict.
RAEKWON: WE HARDLY KNEW YE. I understand I'm old and time is meaningless, but it feels like two weeks ago we did a five-star boom for Raekwon McMillan, a five-star MLB from Georgia that was a must-have on name alone.
From nfl.com's 16 future NFL defensive stars to know:
No. 2 Raekwon McMillan — The Buckeyes' middle linebacker was just another highly talented player among many in the OSU defense last year. This year, he'll be counted on for much more leadership. After leading the defense and all its draft picks in tackles with 119, that shouldn't be a problem. McMillan is also effective in coverage. Think Reggie Ragland, only a step faster.
To expecting parents out there: Why give your mediocre offspring a hipster name when you could instantly turn them into a boss by naming them Raekwon, Luiji or Pencilman?
Brendynn Byrnes would get choked out and WorldStarred by sixth grade. Pencilman Byrnes would a three-star college QB turned New England Patriot slot receiver. The choice is yours, folks.
Raekwon already earned an NFL paycheck, but when it comes to fruition let's all remember his parents' greatness. And may our future be bountiful with Raekwons.
TITUS FREE AGENCY. Mark Titus, the former Ohio State walk-on turned New York Times bestselling author, became a refugee when ESPN cut ties with Bill Simmons and shuttered Grantland. Thanks to something called a "contract," he basically sat out the 2015 CBB season.
Don't look now, but he's taking off his pants and heading for the scorer's table:
As my final hours at ESPN approach, I want to sincerely thank all who made it possible for me to get paid to do nothing the last 7 months.
— Mark Titus (@clubtrillion) May 31, 2016
I was always told do what you love and it won't feel like work. Well I love doing nothing. And its true - it didnt feel like work at all.
— Mark Titus (@clubtrillion) May 31, 2016
Also: Talking w/ handful of places that may or may not actually exist. When I know something, Ill fill in the 27 of you who arent bots.
— Mark Titus (@clubtrillion) May 31, 2016
My agent assures me Titus isn't coming for my job, and he will become my former agent if he's wrong. (Not that he'll weep; 3% of an Arby cashier's salary isn't akin to losing a kneecap.)
A CHANCE TO GIVE BACK.
Will Knight, a former Ohio State wrestler, is raising money to name the new wrestling room at Ohio State's planned multi-sport complex in honor of his late teammates, Major Ray Mendoza and MMA pioneer Kevin Randleman, by selling charitable Buckeye necklaces.
The necklaces are available at clevecrete.com and come in two similar designs, and are available for $75 and $60.
I interviewed Knight back in May as part of my piece on Kevin Randleman. A detail I omitted: Knight came to Ohio State as an aspiring walk-on from Shaker Heights who didn't make a state tournament. In a twist of fate, he had political science class with Randleman, who was already a shot caller on campus. Knight wore a shirt and tie to class; Randleman chose a spaghetti-stringed tank top.
After class, Knight introduced himself.
Randleman remembered him from prior prep tournaments. And after hearing Knight's plan to try out for the team, he took him to St. John arena and put him through one of his legendary workouts. Knight passed the test, got the recommendation of the team's alpha male, and became a three-year letterman at Ohio State.
All these years later, Knight is helping his former teammates. Even if the necklaces don't suit your fancy, it's a worthwhile effort led by a down-to-earth dude.
SUMMER SOLDIER OF FORTUNE TOUR ROLLS ON. I have a vision for Columbus, and it includes all residents replacing their cars with horses.
Via r/Columbus:
People ask why I live on the East Side. Why would I live anywhere else? I'm listing my car on Craigslist and joining the movement later today:
THOSE WMDs. There's no secret to Barcelona's La Masía... Europeans think Switzerland is best place to live and Greece is the worst... A renegade muscles into Mister Softee's turf... Father of Dewshine victim stabbed at memorial...The dangerous world of British betting shops.
