The local team put on the pads for the first time since January yesterday. Offensive lineman Branden Bowen reflected afterward:
My body hasn't felt like this in a long time
— Branden Bowen (@BrandenBowen) March 21, 2017
Just wait until they get older and can injure their necks for a week by sleeping on it wrong for 20 minutes. Then they'll know real pain.
ICYMI:
- Offensive practice observations.
- Defensive practice observations.
- OSU announced auxiliary hiring of Lou Holtz's grandson, Steve Addazio's son, Brian Hartline, and others.
- Jim Harbaugh: "I try to emulate [Woody Hayes]."
- Linebackers coach Bill Davis and quarterbacks coach Ryan Day meet with the media for the first time.
- The alternate jersey championship.
- A to-do list for every Ohio State men's basketballer.
Word of the Day: Insouciance.
PARRIS AT H? Demario McCall seemed like a shoe-in to replace Curtis Samuel at H-Back. It turns out dipshit bloggers don't pick the depth chart.
Ohio State has deployed Parris Campbell in the slot during the spring's opening practice. It seems like preparation for filling Samuel's shoes this fall.
From cleveland.com:
Campbell looked like a natural at kick returner toward the end of last season, but he's never quite looked comfortable as a pass-catching threat. The former high school running back has had problems with drops and route running, and it's fair to wonder if he might get passed over by some of the young talent.
But there was an interesting revelation on the first day of spring practice: Campbell was working with a group of slot receivers. That could be a good move for him, especially if that means he could get some H-back time too. With his speed, there's no question that Campbell is dangerous with the ball in his hands, it's just been a struggle to get it to him. A slot/H-back role could get him the ball quicker and easier.
Campbell's production has never matched Urban Meyer's effusive praise. There are times he looks capable of being the best player on the field and others he disappears for long stretches. Such is how it goes for receivers in Meyer's distributive offense.
It's a new year, though. If guys like Ben Victor and KJ. Hill take a leap like Campbell apparently has, it's all bad news for opposing defenses.
A CRITICAL REVIEW OF BUCKEYE BATTLE CRY. The school fight song is one of the strongest weapons available for university propagandists. It can be used celebrating a local touchdown or as background music while a gaggle of 400-pound mammoths in bootleg jerseys shotgun tallboys of Miller Lite in the Shoe parking lot seven hours before kickoff.
Don't take my homer-ass opinion for it, though.
From Spencer Hall of everydayshouldbesaturday.com:
First of all, it’s got a good name: THE BUCKEYE BATTLE CRY. It’s illogical, because nuts cannot cry or even sing, much less engage in battle or warfare of any sort. All fight songs should start at illogical nonsense, and then move forward towards incoherence from there. The title is good, Ohio State. This is a very good title indeed.
Second, it’s authentic vaudeville-style bom-bompery, another plus when you’re talking about fight songs. Most fight songs for major universities were written out of (or just plain stolen) from military marches or ragtime jazz. We prefer ragtime jazz, since it shares so much of what we consider to be essential college football identity: Near-chaos, rampant fraud, black market economics, and a generally festive atmosphere bordering on something that should be broken up by the authorities.
[...]
Third: it was actually written by a vaudeville guy, Frank Crumit, who actually went to Ohio State, and looks appropriately miserable for someone writing a seminal piece of America’s Most Vocally Miserable State’s culture.
That settles it; Buckeye Battle Cry is objectively good.
It's also weird to think that, should the fabric of the republic ever decay to the point of another Civil War, this song would absolutely be used as marching music for Ohioan infantry.
J.T. BARRETT: TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL. Most college students don't earn degrees before taking a "victory lap" semester in college. J.T. Barrett is too smart for such shenanigans.
Barrett graduated last fall and will only take online classes now.
From Jacob Myers of The Lantern:
Since Barrett graduated in the fall, his entire life has been dedicated to the program.
“I have my degree, so with that, school is taken care of. And now it’s really ball,” Barrett said. “That’s what I have left here at Ohio State. I’m taking a couple classes. They’re online. So right now, my life is football, literally. Now it’s literally just ball.”
Barrett had been framed as one of the maladies that plagued OSU’s passing offense that ranked 81st in the country in 2016. He certainly had his struggles throwing the ball last season, but that was one of the least of the offense’s problems.
People can go down on a ship grumbling about Barrett if they want. I'm all-in on a comeback season. If that lands me at the bottom of the ocean, so be it.
THE EDUCATION OF NICK BOSA. Fast casual diners are a gambit in that you never know how workers are feeling about doling out the protein. Did their wife leave them? Are they a Michigan fan? The questions never cease.
Nick Bosa went to Chipotle and Fortuna, that capricious sprite, did not side with him.
Chipotle servers act like extra chicken is coming out of their pay check...
— Nick Bosa (@nbsmallerbear) March 21, 2017
But lo! Allow a Twitter user to showcase the "work smart, not hard" mantra:
@nbsmallerbear just pretend like you don't want extra and then once they put a whole scoop on, hit em with the extra
— alli (@YoderAlli) March 21, 2017
Sure, the hustle guarantees an "extra meat" surcharge, but it also guarantees you'll have satisfactory meat. Seems like an easy decision.
WOAH, NELLY! Somewhere on another timeline, O.J. Simpson played for Woody Hayes at Ohio State:
That's quite an endorsement. pic.twitter.com/pvdd2saYDu
— Ramzy Nasrallah (@ramzy) March 21, 2017
Thanks to Ramzy for showing me that. Hopefully, he won't mind that I spend the rest of the day pondering "What if?" scenarios rather than work.
THOSE WMDs. The NBA's secret PB&J addiction... American farmers hack their tractors with Ukrainian hardware... The Rough N Rowdy, where a forgotten town dukes it out every year... Word up! The story behind The New York Times' most famous tweet.
