Game Day Skull Session: Get Dumped Then, UNLV

Las Vegas is the worst city in America. Think about everyone you know that's visited. Would our country not be better off with them and it at the bottom of the sea, like Atlantis?

Only insecure people looking to spend away the hole in their soul visit Sin City. Judging by their Instagram posts, every thousandaire thinks they're the first asshole to place a wager or watch enslaved tigers perform circus tricks.

Thanks for the EIGHT grainy Snaps of the Weeknd LOOKING SAD WHILE SINGING ABOUT drug-addled sex with models. Truly inspirational stuff, Travis.

Real Americans don't need to leave their living room to engage in dissipation. It's a lifestyle. Why pay $400 for concert tickets and $13.50 per Bud Light tallboy when I can buy six FourLokos for $12.25 and learn about fluoride conspiracy theories on YouTube for free?

The most offensive thing is the cliché nature of city's depravity. Its local government fetches coffee for a corporate crime cabal that siphons as much money as possible from schlubs incapable of grasping elementary math.

For example, your child's social studies teacher swears spending $10,000 on a new line of credit for three days of PG-13 debauchery with his idiot friends was a sound fiscal decision. He has a Facebook photo album titled "Vegas w/ the Boys" to prove it.

Just be thankful he won't be teaching your progeny in two years when his wife divorces him for a podiatrist who takes Euchre seriously.

Dollars are the only thing these people understand. Even their coach acknowledges a desperate money-grab:

UNLV coach Tony Sanchez on why the Rebels are playing Ohio State. "There's 1.3 million reasons why it's a good deal."

— Lori Schmidt (@LoriSchmidt) September 21, 2017

Amateur sports, baby! Now get these amoral cretins off our freshly manicured lawn and back into the storm drain that hatched them. The future belongs to people with bigger visions than cabana bottle service at a casino's rooftop concrete pond.

Word of the Day: Desolation.

 THAT REBEL DOSSIER. Here's everything you need to know about today's game against the Rebels of the University of Nevada–Las Vegas.

• Preview
• Q&A
• Roundtable
• Scouting report
• Hype trailer
• 10 reasons to hate
• Buckeye depth chart
• Game poster

Be sure to follow 11W, Dan Hope, Andrew Lind, and James Grega on Twitter for updates live from the Horseshoe.

 A NAME TO WATCH. Ohio State wrote a hefty check, but UNLV's team will pay the ultimate price by entering the gauntlet against a superior foe.

This doesn't mean the Rebels are bereft of playmakers, though. One name to watch is wide receiver Devonte Boyd.

From Kyle Morgan of theozone.net:

Devonte Boyd (#83)
WR
6’1” 185
Senior

With a solid frame and athletic body, Boyd plays larger than his listed height and weight because of his play strength. He has good ability to win contested catches and can maintain balance and control through contact. He will operate in the middle of the field primarily, working slant patterns and displays very good agility and change of pace. Boyd is very “sudden” as a route runner, creating space for his QB to make an easy throw. Has solid speed to create yards after the catch.

I hope quarterback Armani Rogers targets Boyd 100 times today. I'd like to see the secondary tested as much as possible before Big Ten play (kinda) opens next week against Rutgers.

 #PERTINENTHEISENBERG. To a true professional, nothing is more offensive than an amateur.

PROPHECY: 55-0, local team.

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