Turns out, marriage in 2021 is basically just endlessly making dance videos online with your wife.
But I must admit, this is my best performance yet.
Word of the Day: Aberrant.
MULLETS <<<<<<<<. When Ryan Day needed a defensive coordinator, he backed up the damn Brinks truck to Stillwater and took the best one available, hiring Jim Knowles from Oklahoma State by more than tripling his salary.
It would seem that Mike Gundy is just a tadddddd bitter.
"... Consistency is the most important thing in building a big-time college football program, in my opinion. Now, I’ve never been at some of these schools where as people say you wake up on third base and you think you hit a triple. I’ve never been there, so I don’t know what it’s like to coach at a school like that. Coach Knowles will know.”
I love the vague "people say" like everyone in that room didn't know exactly what he was talking about.
It's cool though. I see how it is. We'll just have to settle it on the field when we have a chance to meet you in the College Football Playo... Oh shit, never mind.
Well, maybe we'll just have to schedule a home-and-home or something. Give your program one of those buy games to help keep it afloat.
BEST IN THE BUSINESS. This is your friendly reminder that Mark Pantoni is the absolute best in the nation at his job, and that ain't just my professional homerism talking.
My good pal Ari Wasserman (and also Bruce Feldman, but I don't know him like that) of The Athletic spoke to recruiting coordinators across the country to try to determine which one was the best, and Pantoni basically lapped the rest of the field.
1. Mark Pantoni, director of player personnel, Ohio State
Total survey points: 20
Started at Ohio State: 2012...
What Pantoni’s peers are saying:
• “To maintain that level of organization at a pressure-cooker of a school like Ohio State is just unbelievable.”
• “Mark Pantoni’s national track record through multiple staffs is undeniable, and he is the undisputed top dog in the space. Ohio State doesn’t make many mistakes, are in sync as a staff and always close well.”
• “I admire him and his ability to work on multiple staffs and keep that consistency. He’s whatever you want to call it, the OG, the lead guy in our profession, our little pocket of college football. He is a great person. He’s always willing to help young people. And he’s a great evaluator. He is a man of conviction and confidence. He is able to stand on the table for a guy he believes in and doesn’t back down from assistants. He has high emotional intelligence. He just gets it. No matter where he is at, whether it is at Ohio State or the 125th-ranked team, he’d make a difference.”
• “Mark is ‘The Godfather.’ His influence can be seen across all corners of college football.”
• “I value consistency and stability and have chased that my entire career, and he’s the definition of both.”
Allow me to put those 20 "total survey points" in perspective: second place had 15.5, and there was a three-way tie for third place with each of them getting six total points. This wasn't even close.
Nobody's touching "The Godfather." I'm just glad he's on my side.
MAN KILLERS. Yesterday, I talked about how hilarious it was that Jaxon Smith-Njigba was the clear top-performing wide receiver on the roster when both Garrett Wilson and Chris Olave were on the team, too.
This would be why:
Most TDs versus man coverage this season among Big Ten WRs
— PFF College Football (@PFF_College) December 16, 2021
Garrett Wilson/Chris Olave: 5 pic.twitter.com/BbzCe1tGAM
Ohio State had three receivers that were just completely unguardable on any given play. There's nothing at all fair about that. Thankfully, I've never been all that interested in "fair." You know what's more fun than fair? Winning.
GAVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANTED. Turns out, Cameron Brown is a man of the people.
Yall really want me too huh ? Lol https://t.co/Pa4SWKLvq4
— Cameron Brown (@luh_cam_) December 16, 2021
I was extremely salty with Ohio State's decision not to pursue Eli Ricks (and still am, to some extent), but I begrudgingly admit that it makes a whole lot more sense now that I know Brown is returning.
But I sure know what I would have done...
SONG OF THE DAY. "Christmas Time is Here" by Vince Guaraldi Trio.
NOT STICKING TO SPORTS. A family sues a funeral home for $85 million claiming the body in the casket was not their father... The U.S. just put $5 million bounties on four of El Chapo's sons... Aggressive deer keep attacking a Rudolph decoration... Bali had just 45 international tourists in 2021... The Harvard job offer no one at Harvard ever heard of...
