I will not potshot Brian Hartline today. I will not potshot Brian Hartline today. I will not potshot Brian Hartline today.
Alright, folks! Who's ready to put in work blowing Thursday off!? Remember: Jobs aren't real and your boss is scared to replace you.
ICYMI:
- Get to know Bill Davis, Urban Meyer's latest staff addition. (Spoiler: "Billy Davis was Urban Meyer's best man!" is the new "Tom Herman founded MENSA!")
- Fight to the End: Dontre Wilson
- Ramzy's eloquent summation of my feelings for Jabrill Peppers.
- Help put a statue of Woody Hayes in his hometown.
- Brooklyn Dagger shirts back!
SO, WE'LL FIGHT IN THE SHADE. When Meyer descended from an ESPN studio into Columbus, I remember marveling at the routine use of five-receiver formations in the spring game. It's actually going to happen! The local team will score 100 points a game!
And while Meyer put the flame to plenty of opponents, this year's offense lacks the traditional consistency and explosiveness. So if the Buckeyes want to survive Clemson and possibly topple either Alabama or Washington, it will have to fall back on an old not-so-secret recipe.
BY GAWD! THAT'S TRESSELBALL'S MUSIC!
From si.com:
The arrival of Urban Meyer after the 2011 season would mean a more wide-open offense, frequent fourth-down gambles and a general upgrade in football aesthetics. But as Ohio State enters the 2017 College Football Playoff with a weak offensive line, pedestrian wideouts and no game-breaking tailback, Meyer needs to rekindle the conservative ethos of his predecessor. "If Ohio State is going to win the national title," said a coach who scouted them extensively this season, "they're going to have to win it on defense and special teams."
Sound familiar? The Buckeyes' offense is a paradox. It led the Big Ten in scoring offense (42.7 points per game), total offense (479.5 yards per game) and rushing offense (258.3). Junior quarterback J.T. Barrett is 26–3 as a starter. But Ohio State has sputtered against stout defenses, yielding six sacks and 11 tackles for loss to Penn State and eight sacks and 13 tackles for loss to Michigan. Any hopes of a national title in Columbus center on fending off perhaps the country's two best defensive lines, Clemson's and Alabama's.
How do the Buckeyes do that? Tressel-ball.
Clemson fans don't have the arteries for a Tresselball banger, and hell, the Tigers make for a prime candidate for Tresselization.
My only question would be if this year's special teams are as lock-and-key as Tressel's were. Cam Johnston could punt for Tressel anytime, but execution in other areas has been as inconsistent as the offense.
That defense, though...
URBAN AND DESHAUN AT UF = NO GOOD. It's a shame for Florida fans that Meyer faked a heart attack to spend time with his non-existent family, because if not they may be cheering for Meyer and Deshaun Watson and not preparing for an Outback Bowl.
From dispatch.com:
“He was my favorite coach growing up, especially when he was at Florida,” Watson said.
That’s when Watson said he saw a coach, and more to the point, an offense that he thought fit him to a ‘T.’ Meyer arrived at Florida in 2005 and had a remarkable run, especially from 2006 to ’09, when Tim Tebow was at quarterback. The Gators won national championships in 2006 and ’08, and a Heisman for Tebow in 2007.
“I was a huge Gators fan, and one of the reasons was because of him, Tim Tebow — those two guys I kind of looked up to growing up,” Watson said. “As a ninth-grader (in 2010), especially when I went to visit, that’s where I wanted to go. I was telling myself, ‘I want to be a Gator.’ ”
I can tolerate my team losing to Clemson, whose biggest moment in my lifetime was losing to Alabama in the 2015 title game.
Watson and Meyer at Florida would've been insufferable. I wish nothing but terrible things on Florida until the day I die.
NOT IN URBAN'S HOUSE. Players opting out of bowls is the topic talk shows love to know. Everyone has an opinion, even those who never had to weigh playing an exhibition game as a risk against earning millions of dollars.
Thankfully, Meyer is an autocrat. According to Cris Carter, this won't be a problem at Ohio State:
"I've talked to Urban Meyer. You won't be seeing this at Ohio State." @criscarter80 on players sitting out bowl games pic.twitter.com/HB8v4vH6JL
— Herd w/Colin Cowherd (@TheHerd) December 21, 2016
Another way to prevent radioactive #take material spawning in Columbus: Keep earning playoff bids.
(BTW, this trend will lead to the NCAA expanding the tournament all the way to 24 teams [like the FCS] and all of us will watch the hell out of it.)
OLD COLUMBUS TOWN. Annie Apple has traveled across the country following her son, Eli, during his rookie season in the NFL. Last week, she visited the hometown Philadelphia Eagles as an enemy combatant.
So she's seen some things in the NFL. But nothing compares to the ol' Horseshoe on the banks of the Olentangy.
From si.com:
Now, I’ve gone to more NFL games than I’d ever dreamed possible. From Dallas to Pittsburgh, the games and the fans are quite the experience. Most players’ families don’t go to away games because you only get about ten minutes to see your son after the games. Add in travel and hotel accommodations, and the trip can be costly. But I have enjoyed checking out other stadiums. [...]
I will say, when it comes to the fan experience, nothing beats games in the Horseshoe at The Ohio State University. College football game experiences are by far the best, so while NFL game day experiences are each unforgettable in their own way, coming from the Shoe to MetLife Stadium has been quite the football culture shock.
The Giants’ fan experience in the Meadowlands is most corporate football experience I’ve had, though the deejay has been turning it up lately. Fans are in their seats for most of the game, only getting up during third downs on defense. During the Giants-Jets preseason game, with the Jets as the home team, it was different. Jets fans are crazy-fun; they’re like Eagles fans, but more well-behaved. Giants’ fans love their team, but they aren’t the loudest. Often, the crowd only gets hyped when a Michael Strahan video is played right before third down asking everyone to get up on their feet. Other than that, the fans pretty much sit in their seats when the Giants are on defense.
Apple keeps it 100 at all times, so this isn't propaganda.
NFL arenas are trash-heaps designed to suck as much public money out of the local tax base as possible. I've seen more character and soul in money laundering operations.
At NFL games there's also a 30% chance you get sucker-punched by an off-duty construction worker irate about a third-down call.
Why would you ever go to an NFL game? (I'm reckoning with my own past decisions; please ignore me.)
A YOUNG JEDI RISES. Mark Pantoni is probably the most unheralded full-time member of Urban Meyer's staff, and he has a new protege.
From footballscoop.com:
Ohio State: Sources tell FootballScoop that Urban Meyer has promoted recruiting analyst Eron Hodges to assistant director of player personnel where he will work closely with director of player personnel Mark Pantoni.
Congrats to Hodges, and may all the #booms echo through eternity.
THOSE WMDs. Houston football is trying to lift the city... Miss Cleo went from joke to legend... Pro with "remarkable" $9.6 million Baccarat scheme has to pay it back, judge says... Female doctors may be better than male doctors... Tips for new platoon officers.
