Hail, noblemen and noblerwomen. I'm taking over this Thursday Skull Session because Chris is running some black-ops mission in the Paktika Providence of Afghanistan. I wish I could speak more on it, but it's a matter of national security that you find me here. Please forgive me.
The two-byes-in-a-season meme has grown on me. This second bye comes at a great time for Ohio State. Those are my two #hot #sprots takes regarding the bye week. I've been sharpening those knives all weekend.
Now... who brought the FourLokos? It's 6 AM on Thursday, and I'm looking to set the weekend off right.
URBAN DOTH SPEAK. Yesterday after practice, Urban met with local media figures, as the Iron Chief of Ohio State football is want to do from time to time. (You can see Kyle's full write-up on the practice HERE.) Some of the key points stressed by Meyer, however, were as follows:
- Asked if he’ll be watching football on the couch drinking a brew, Urban Meyer responded, “The last time I called it a brew I was 19.”
- “My wife sent me a text asking if Luke interviewed [for the Florida Atlantic job]. He did not interview. He better not have.”
- Meyer said politicking is not enjoyable, but he has no choice because he works for the players.
- “Are we a really good team? I can't compare us to the other three or four teams because I really haven't seen them.”
- Taylor Decker is ahead of schedule with MCL sprain. Corey Linsley said Decker will play at Illinois.
- Meyer: "You come back 5 pounds overweight, you act like a jerk over the weekend and do something wrong, then you’re not part of the chase."
WHITLOCK UNLOADS ON TAYLOR LEWAN, MICHIGAN. Brady Hoke is Jason Whitlock's boy; something the ESPN columnist is willing to admit. Whitlock campaigned for Brady Hoke, then coach of San Diego State, to replace Rich Rodriguez. Michigan, however, has disappointed Whitlock this year with its "soft, low character play." He says Michigan State "exposed" Michigan last Saturday.
So who's fault is this? Definitely not the chief's:
I see a team that looks more like Taylor Lewan than Brady Hoke. Lewan is the Jadeveon Clowney of the Big Ten, the pampered superstar who's doing his school a favor by suiting up this season.
Clowney, the South Carolina defensive end, has taken all the heat this season for being a college superstar who's unwilling to play hard while waiting to collect NFL millions. In comparison to Lewan's performance and effort, Clowney looks like the second coming of Lawrence Taylor.
No one talks about offensive linemen because most sports fans cannot properly evaluate their play. Lewan plays my position. He's been embarrassing. The ridiculous and selfish unsportsmanlike conduct penalty he received in Saturday's game is indicative of his play all season. He's resorted to cheap shots and bullying because he failed to adequately prepare to have a dominant senior season.
I agree with Whitlock: Michigan is shitty. But it's the fault of Lewan? It's Hoke who's getting paid millions of dollars. This is his third season. These are his star recruits who he has failed to develop. But hey, let's blame the kid who literally turned down millions of dollars to come back and play for a four-loss Michigan team, right?
DANNY WOODHEAD WAS PRLY GETTING THAT CAKECHADRON STATE CHEATED. It's assumed every elite program has some dirt under their finger nails when it comes to abiding by the NCAA's archaic rulebook. Turns out, the program doesn't even have to be elite to be on the hustle. Enter Chadron State, the alma mater of the goofy-looking Danny Woodhead:
CHADRON, Neb. (AP) — The NCAA put Chadron State on three years of probation and vacated 15 wins over two seasons Wednesday after determining its former football coach had secret bank accounts and extra benefits for players at the Division II school.
The Eagles did not lose any scholarships and will not be banned from the playoffs.
Uh, what? A few vacated wins when it was proven a former coach had secret bank accounts and extra benefits for players? Remember when a few idiot teens selling their own stuff and getting discounted tattoos drew talk of a TV ban and a handful of nickels kept the juke box running all night? Those were the days.
(BTW, RIP @SportsByBrooks, who I assume is trapped on an island somewhere like Tom Hanks in 'Castaway.' Why haven't I read an investigational piece on why he decided to walk away from his empire?)
LES MILES THA SWERVE KING. Whether Ohio State fans like it or not, on Saturday they'll be in the corner of noted witch doctor and LSU football coach Les Miles. Let's keep that in mind when we watch Les Miles drive without a seat belt, talk breakfast and run a red light:
Do you think this is all some sort of troll act that Les Miles takes media members on? It's an idea of pondered. (I can't tell if that makes me or him crazier.)
FROM THE "WOW THE BIG TEN ISN'T VERY GOOD" FILES. Did you know the Big Ten is struggling to fill its eight allotted slots through the glorious bowl system? Oh, it's true:
INDIANAPOLIS (AP) - No. 4 Ohio State is chasing perfection and a chance play for a national championship. No. 18 Michigan State has the inside track to the Big Ten championship game.
Four other conference teams are bowl-eligible and Iowa could join that list with a win this weekend.
But with only four weeks left in the regular season, the Big Ten is looking at the possibility of coming up short in postseason play again - even before the bowl lineups are announced. With eight bowl tie-ins, six qualifiers and Iowa on the cusp, the last available spot will have to be filled by one of three teams that are a combined 1-12 in league play: Illinois, Indiana or Northwestern.
If the Big Ten costs Ohio State a chance to play for the national title, it might be time to talk to SECession.
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