Inertia is a property of matter.
I learned that from Bill Nye, along with a lot of other things during the mid-1990's on PBS. That very particular nostalgia bomb is going to be the theme of this year's Threat Level, for a few reasons.
First, the 1990's were the last time that Michigan truly felt dangerous as a foil for the Ohio State Buckeyes. Wolverine fans tried hyping up the likes of Chad Henne and Mike Hart in the early 2000's, and they managed to beat Ohio State exactly zero times during their collegiate careers. Denard Robinson was a fun player to watch before falling apart like a frozen T-1000, usually sometime in late October. Shea Patterson was supposed to be the answer to Michigan's quarterbacking prayers, until he wasn't. And so on.
But the 2021 edition of The Game brought back all the old memories of the Bad Years that I thought I had locked away in the same part of my brain that stores old Wishbone episodes and remembers every Rockapella song from Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?, so I figure that Threat Level is probably the best way to purge those bad thoughts while also reminiscing about Ghost Writer.
Secondly, I'm an educator and those old PBS shows were all about learning. So what, exactly, did we learn about Michigan in the offseason? What kind of team will we be following in 2022 on the road to a truly apocalyptic clash in November? What scientific formula can we apply to crack the genetic code of the Wolverines?
Well, I'm glad I asked.
THE OFFENSE
Any discussion of Michigan football in 2022 should probably start with their chaotic offseason that saw them replace both coordinators around the same time that their head coach tried to dip for the NFL, but in truth, I don't think that's going to be as big a factor as one might hope. The talent is here for Michigan to be a Top 15 offense.
The 2021 Michigan Wolverines were the best rushing team in the Big Ten, and even though they've lost Hassan Haskins to the NFL, running backs Blake Corum and Donovan Edwards should be more than capable. Additionally, their wide receivers will constitute probably the second-best unit in the Big Ten, as veteran Ronnie Bell should return to make an instant impact after missing almost all of 2021, and guys like Cornelius Johnson and Roman Wilson appear primed to take the next step up.
Of course, the real question is who's going to be behind center, and while Cade McNamara and J.J. McCarthy are both decent choices (one more polished, the other more talented), Jim Harbaugh headfaked everyone and decided to not make a choice at all, opting instead of drag out this quarterback competition to at least two games into the season.
Harbaugh its a process re: QBs pic.twitter.com/pXYHlcYYZk
— angelique (@chengelis) August 29, 2022
The problem with this is that two games against two godawful Colorado State and Hawai'i teams aren't going to tell anyone anything about who should be starting, meaning that Harbaugh will probably pinball between the two QBs throughout the season, making both worse. But it's a process, guys. It's a process!
THE DEFENSE
This is where things get really, really interesting. Michigan played Tresselball in 2021. A great run game, average passing game, and solid defense won them a lot of games (until it didn't), but a lot of that was predicated on winning on the defensive margins thanks to great individual defensive efforts.
They can't afford to play that way in 2022. New defensive coordinator Jesse Minter is happily abiding by outgoing (and fellow Raven family tree) coach Mike Macdonald's template, but he's going to be doing so without an absolute assload of production from last season.
Defensive linemen Adian Hutchinson and David Ojabo accounted for the vast, vast majority of sacks and tackles for loss, and linebacker Josh Ross and defensive back Daxton Hill made up almost all of the rest. All four guys are now in the NFL. Safeties Vincent Gray and Brad Hawkins? They're gone too.
All told, the Wolverines return just three starters on the defensive side of the ball. Defensive lineman Taylor Upshaw will be a force, but he's going to be asked to carry a defense that will need to find consistency, quickly.
WHAT DID WE LEARN THIS WEEK?
Michigan's schedule is laughably bad this season, and Hawai'i losing to Vanderbilt by 53 points only served to hammer that point home. The Wolverines should cruise to a 4-0 start in a year where they play college football's 112th weakest schedule and have only four road games (and no, that's not a typo or me forgetting to add a neutral site. Four road games. That's it.).
But, thankfully, Jim Harbaugh found a way to make things interesting with a quarterback controversy of his own making, which I will no doubt gleefully exploit in the weeks to come. Still, Michigan won The Game last season, went on to be Big Ten champs, and ended up in the playoff. That's an inescapable fact, so until new evidence shows otherwise, we're going to start the Threat Level at BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL!
I mean, HIGH.
