The nice thing about preparing for (and expecting) the worst in every scenario is that any other result feels like a massive win.
The Browns didn't outthink themselves. I am as stunned as you are,
Oh, and as you might've heard: 2014 OSU is the first national champion to not field a first round NFL draft pick since 2002 OSU.
Guess what, haters? That's horrendous news for your duplicitous lot.
This week's NSFW ANTI-WORK #BANGERS:
- The Ruthless Chris Partlow.
- Brother Mouzone shoots Cheese.
- Omar pays a visit to Prop Joe's shop.
WHY URBAN WINS. I believe Urban Meyer to be the best coach in college sports. (Eventually, he will be the best in all sports.) The only thing that derailed him at Florida was himself, and thankfully, he used that time away from the game to fine tune his death machine.
An Ohio State championship was inevitable under him.
From Jim Stone of JimStoneVB.com:
“His plan is in total detail, start to finish, January 1st to December 31st, on how to win,” secondary coach Kerry Coombs said. “To work for him, you better be sharp. I worked with Brian Kelly and Butch Jones at Cincinnati. I’ve coached with really good people. But this guy here? He’s special. He’s not winning by accident.
[...]
“Most coaching staffs visit one or two other programs in the off-season in hopes of gaining some additional insight," [Mickey Marotti said]. The Buckeyes visited six: Boston College, Clemson, Georgia, Georgia Tech, Louisville, the Cincinnati Bengals and the Kansas City Chiefs. “You can always get better. It’s good to see, ‘this is what they have, and we need to do this, this and this to make our area better.’ I think if you’re open to that stuff, you’re able to get better.
“The cool part about him and being head coach is, he gets to get away. In February, he went away for a week. He’ll read a book or two and he’ll come back with something new. We call it enhancing. Rather than change what you do, you enhance it. He’s always trying to grow and get better. I love when he goes away and comes back, but then again, a part of me doesn’t love it because I know that phone call is coming. As soon as his plane lands, I might be at the end of a training period where our coaches are blowing out in here and then here comes this new thing. But that’s what makes him who he is, that’s what makes him great.”
I'm no OSU historian, but look into your heart: Has Ohio State football's future ever been brighter? Not in my lifetime, anyway.
ASCENSIÓN DE EL GUAPO. Frank Gore won't be thieving carries from Carlos Hyde this year, and the Handsome One could be in line for a workhorse season.
From Chris Biderman of NinersDigest.com:
Hyde said patience as a runner was the most important thing Gore taught him last season, which comes as no surprise. During his prolonged career, Gore's been known as one of the most patient backs in the NFL with a knack for setting up his blocks and letting plays develop before squeaking through holes.
Hyde had a different approach as a rookie: try to hit the hole as quickly and violently as he could, which didn't always work. The rookie had six games in which he averaged less than three yards per carry.
His role will be expanded in the coming season under new offensive coordinator Geep Chryst, who was Colin Kaepernick's quarterback's coach in 2014. Under former offensive coordinator Greg Roman, 49ers running backs were typically at the bottom of the league in receptions, which is a dimension in the offense that could change this year. "I think year we'll definitely hone into that," Hyde said.
A "red-shirt" year isn't the worse thing for a rookie running back. After all, a man only has so many magic diamond totes in his body.
NICK SABAN'S A LIAR. Would you believe Nick Saban cheated at a charity golf event? I would. I'd believe it in a second, even before you told me he was partnered against Urban Meyer, the man who snuffed him on national television a little over three moons hence.
From Ben Axelrod of BleacherReport.com:
Unlike their battle in the Bayou on New Year's Day, it was the Crimson Tide who walked away victorious against the Buckeyes on Tuesday, scoring a six-under par on the front nine, compared to Meyer and Logan's four-under. Saban and Ingram would go on to lose to Team Georgia Tech—football coach Paul Johnson and former basketball star Jon Barry—in a four-hole playoff, although Meyer and [Jeff] Logan had some concerns about the legitimacy of Team Alabama's run on the first nine holes.
"There’s a little bit of handicap involved and both Urban and I had a little bit of a question as to maybe Alabama was getting a couple of extra shots that they didn’t deserve," Logan said. "But we’ll take our medicine. They got to six and we got to four.”
I'm sure Logan was being tongue-and-cheek, but I don't need to see any more proof to convict Saban and Mark Ingram.
HOW TOM HERMAN BECAME A QB GURU. Fret not, people who used to bash Tom Herman's playcalling: He didn't play quarterback either, so there's hope one day you can rise off your couch and seize some of your own glory.
From Bruce Feldman of FoxSports.com:
I've always been intrigued how guys who never played a position -- especially QB -- become so good at coaching it. Norm Chow played O-line at Utah. Mike Leach played rugby in college at BYU. Gus Malzahn was a receiver at Henderson State. When I visited Herman at UH a few weeks ago, I asked him how he made the transition to handling quarterbacks.
"I think I learned a lot from osmosis," he said. "I was at Texas State in 2005. I'd never coached quarterbacks and never called plays a day in my life. David Bailiff hired me and we go 11-3, and Barrick Nealy breaks all kinds of QB records. I grinded. I got my hands on every drill tape I could. I went to clinics. Every brain I could pick, I picked. And I wasn't too proud to ask the kids."
Troubling, however, was the fact a CTRL+F of "MENSA" yielded zero results. (Is joking about Hermans MENSA membership the new "Tom Herman is in MENSA, by the way"? It might just be.)
POOOOOR FLORIDA. Not to pick at old wounds, but remember when it seemed like Florida was ol' King Tut?
It's hilarious how the mighty have fallen:
Well this pic just got more depressing pic.twitter.com/gVG4Gkzyol
— Ryan (@ClutchLikeMJ) April 30, 2015
I speak for the thinking part of America: May the Gators be casted down into mediocrity forever.
THOSE WMDs. Viva Manny Ramirez... How Sepp Blatter controls soccer... Apple Watch costs under $85 to make... Freddie Roach: The Best Damn Trainer Alive... STOLEN: iPad prototype, prescription drugs, $7500 — oh, and also a man.
