Game Day Skull Session: Get Dumped Then, Nebraska

By D.J. Byrnes on October 14, 2017 at 4:59 am
Children of the Corn about to get reaped for the October 14th 2017 Skull Session
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It's impossible to trash Nebraska. It's just not in my heart. 

Ask any Buckeye fan about their experience in Lincoln. If the tale involves bad steaks or irascible Husker fans, they're agents of anarchy looking to sew conference chaos.

Why would we bulldoze this bucolic corn colony of psychopathic children with an industrial farm combine? As Woody Hayes once famously said, "Let he without sin cast the first forward pass."

Imagine what Columbus would look like if the local team endured Bo Pelini—and replaced him with a retired chiropractor.

Huskers used to be swagger daddies, too. Now they're swinging for the Outback Bowl while condemned to the middle of a blue chip desert. (If only they were sponsored by an athletics company willing to pay players. Maybe there'd be an uptick in recruiting...)

As long as they aren't abducting and ritualistically butchering Ohioans, it seems a cathartic way to blow off steam from another four-loss season. It's not like their relaxed child labor laws have hurt undercut our superior corn exports, either.

I can only say, "Best of luck to tonight, Nebraska!" (Now let's go back praying their pox of mediocrity never come to our fruitful shores.)

10/14 SLATE
TIME (ET) GAME FAVORITE CHANNEL
12:00 #6 TEXAS CHRISTIAN at KANSAS STATE TCU (-7) FS1
12:00 #17 MICHIGAN at INDIANA UM (8-8) ABC
12:00 #24 TEXAS TECH at WEST VIRGINIA WVU (-3½) ESPNU
12:00 RUTGERS at ILLINOIS LOL (NO) BTN
3:30 PURDUE at #7 WISCONSIN UW (-16½) BTN
3:30 #10 AUBURN at LOUISIANA STATE AUB (-7½) CBS
3:30 #12 OKLAHOMA vs. TEXAS OU (-9) ESPN
7:15 ARKANSAS at #1 ALABAMA BAMA (-31½) ESPN
7:30 MISSOURI at #4 GEORGIA UGA (-29½) SEC
8:00 UTAH at #13 SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA USC (-13) ABC
8:00 #21 MICHIGAN STATE at MINNESOTA MSU (-4) BTN
10:45 #5 WASHINGTON at ARIZONA STATE UW (-17½) ESPN

"This slate is garbage," you might be thinking. Well, you're right at first glance. But we're still talking college football.

From espn.com:

Consider this history lesson, from ESPN's Stats & Information: This is the latest into a season in which we've had no matchups of AP-ranked teams since Week 12 of 2009, the weekend before Thanksgiving. That week, four ranked teams lost to unranked opponents, including two teams that were ranked in the top 15.

My eyes will be on Whatever They Call the Red River Shootout These Days. Both Oklahoma and Texas went all-in on young coaches this offseason. Should be a good one in Dallas.

Word of the Day: Lambast.

 THE HUSKER DOSSIER. Here's everything you need to know about tonight's opponent and some #gamedaydayreads.

Be sure to follow 11W, Dan Hope, Andrew Lind, and James Grega on Twitter for updates live from the Horseshoe.

 #PERTINENTCORNCHILDREN. Mike Riley is not the man to lead the Huskers back to glory. Stay around for the postgame to watch the iconic Husker ritual where they fire him by cursing him to Hell.

PROPHECY: 52-17, Bucks.

 THOSE WMDs. Hacking a power grid in four (not-so-easy) steps... Letters from an arsonist... What Americans heard in Havana attacks... "The Calm Before the Storm" by Nikolay Dubovskoy (1890)... Spot fake photos on the web... Dirty John: Con artist terrorizes California family.

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