BOOM
2025 cornerback Jordyn Woods flips from Cincinnati and commits to Ohio State.
Fucking Rutgers.
What more can be said, really, about the academic bastion of a state that doesn't trust its residents to pump their own gas?
You know how people claim to live in Chicago, but the actually live an hour away in some sterilized suburb nobody's ever heard of? That's how the entire state of New Jersey acts about living in New York.
Outside of Noah Brown, Darius Slade and Jordan Fuller, the only other redeemable character in Jersey is this fella, who I assume is their khan:
This game is attracting all types of fans. This guy put tape on and then went to the beach. 90 minutes later: voila pic.twitter.com/9av2AfI7h2
— Dan Duggan (@DDuggan21) September 13, 2014
The only intrigue about today's game is if Rutgers brought its goony cannon guard and if it's going to make it go boom when the Scarlet Knights cobble together one of their two field goals.
As for the slate, it's an improvement on last week's in the sense a Paul Chryst-coached team is only involved in the second-best game of the day.
| TIME (ET) | GAME | FAVORITE | TELEVISION |
|---|---|---|---|
| 12:00 | No. 13 BAYLOR at IOWA STATE | BU (-17) | FS1 |
| 12:00 | No. 23 FLORIDA at VANDERBILT | UF (-8½ | SECN |
| 12:00 | No. 22 TEXAS at OKLAHOMA STATE | OSU (-3) | ABC |
| 12:00 | No. 14 MIAMI (FL) at GEORGIA TECH | UM (-7½) | ESPN2 |
| 3:30 | No. 11 TENNESSEE at No. 25 GEORGIA | UT (-3½) | CBS |
| 3:30 | NORTH CAROLINA at No. 12 FLORIDA STATE | FSU (-11) | ESPN |
| 3:30 | No. 8 WISCONSIN at No. 4 MICHIGAN | UM (-10½) | ABC |
| 3:30 | ILLINOIS at No. 13 NEBRASKA | NEB (-21) | ESPN2 |
| 4:00 | No. 9 TEXAS A&M at SOUTH CAROLINA | A&M (-18) | SECN |
| 5:00 | OKLAHOMA at No. 21 TEXAS CHRISTIAN | OU (-3½) | FOX |
| 6:00 | No. 18 UTAH at CALIFORNIA | CAL (-2) | PAC12 |
| 7:00 | MEMPHIS at No. 17 MISSISSIPPI | MISS (-14½) | ESPN2 |
| 7:00 | KENTUCKY at No. 1 ALABAMA | BAMA (-35½) | ESPN |
| 8:00 | No. 3 LOUISVILLE at No. 5 CLEMSON | UL (-2) | ABC |
| 10:15 | UTAH STATE at No. 24 BOISE STATE | BSU (-21½) | ESPN2 |
Michigan is smacking Wisconsin, but I'd love to be wrong. Either way, we'll get some answers about that run game because I refuse to believe you can ride the arm of statue named Wilton to a national title.
Give me Louisville down in Death Valley, too.
The Cardinals have a Marionaire on their roster, and Clemson looks a lot like 2015 Ohio State right now. Fortunately for the Tigers, early October losses don't mean as much as late November ones.
Also, I decided I want the Wolverines at 11-0 when their caravan of Big Wheels rolls into Columbus. I want to see their fans' eyes bulge as the dopamine rushes through their cortex as they look upon a possibility of Michigan truly "being back."
And then I want the local team to kick them in the sternum and send them tumbling back down into the abyss, with only the insane ramblings of Jim Harbaugh to keep them company.
That would be more satisfying than flaying Rich Rodriguez or scrapping in an Applebees parking lot with a six-loss Brady Hoke, who fought with the ferocity of a man riding a 72-hour PCP bender.
THE SCARLET KNIGHT FILE. Here's everything you need to know about today's sorry ass opponent:
- Preview
- Mailbag
- Roundtable
- Trailer
- Game poster
- Depth chart
- Prognosticating
- Ramzy's Rutgers week missive
- The Rutgers–Ohio State connection
- Flip will feature memorial coin in honor of the late Sam Foltz and Mike Sadler
- Earle Bruce will dot the "i" and join an exclusive club
Make sure to follow @EricSeger33, @TimShoemaker, and @11W for up-to-the-minute updates via Twitter. And follow @Edge11W, who designed the baller header graphic you see above.
#PERTINENTWIRE. Give Rutgers credit; at least it's not rolling Kyle Flood against Urban Meyer this year. I haven't seen a mismatch like that since Urban Meyer vs. Jim Harbaugh in 2015.
Eternal props to Chris Ash, but this is business. Everybody here knows the drill, from the dipshit on the couch to Rutgers' locker room. Just hand over the cash and the dope and nobody gets hurt.
PROPHECY: 52-13, local team.
THOSE WMDs. Massive cuts remade The Denver Post... Two stolen Van Goghs recovered by anti-mafia police... A 1906 profile of the world's only billionaire... How to tell if you're a jerk... Al Capone in Alcatraz... Video: Can't wait for my shitty grandson to make music while I die.
