Woke up out of a coma this morning and heard the Sooners are on deck.
If somebody told you they were vacationing in Oklahoma, you would immediately suspect they were wanted for killing a man or they suffered from untreated mental illness.
Their only state funding comes from ensnared speeders and drug traffickers trying to flee that cursed state in as little time as possible.
Even Bob Stoops tapped out before taking another ass whipping on national TV. He'd rather play Bocce in Youngstown than get paid ~$5.5 million to coach this team.
Their quarterback, Baker Mayfield vacationed in Little Rock. Then he talked shit to the police and got ganked.
I'm supposed to respect this guy's scrambling like it's akin to that of the Gingerbread Man? M8, the Gingerbread Man is a proper legend. Mayfield couldn't even beat Little Rock PD in a footrace down the block.
Six Keystone Lights and getting owned by the police probably qualifies as a wild story in Norman. The good news for their hero is Ohio State's defensive line won't come armed with tasers.
The bad news is, like the Little Rock PD, they won't need them.
| TIME (ET) | MATCHUP | FAVORITE | TV CHANNEL |
|---|---|---|---|
| 12:00 | CINCINNATI at #8 MICHIGAN | UM (-34½) | ABC |
| 12:00 | LANE KIFFIN at #9 WISCONSIN | UW (-32½) | BTN |
| 12:00 | #17 LOUISVILLE at NORTH CAROLINA | UL (-10) | ESPN |
| 12:00 | IOWA at IOWA STATE | IU (-3) | ESPN2 |
| 12:00 | NORTHWESTERN at DUKE | NU (-3) | ESPNU |
| 3:30 | FRESNO STATE at #1 ALABAMA | BAMA (-44) | ESPN2 |
| 3:30 | PITTSBURGH at #4 PENN STATE | PSU (-21½) | AB |
| 3:30 | #23 TEXAS CHRISTIAN at ARKANSAS | TCU (-3) | CBS |
| 3:30 | INDIANA at VIRGINIA | IU (-3) | ESPNU |
| 4:30 | NEBRASKA at OREGON | UO (-13½) | FOX |
| 7:00 | #13 AUBURN at #3 CLEMSON | CLEM (-5½) | ESPN |
| 7:30 | #15 GEORGIA at #24 NOTRE DAME | ND (-4) | NBC |
| 8:00 | MONTANA at #7 WASHINGTON | UW (OFF) | PAC12 |
| 8:30 | #14 STANFORD at #6 USC | USC (-5½) | FOX |
| 10:00 | MINNESOTA at OREGON STATE | OSU (-2) | FS1 |
| 10:15 | UTAH at BRIGHAM YOUNG | UTES (-2) | ESPN2 |
| 10:30 | BOISE STATE at #20 WASHINGTON STATE | WSU (10½) | ESPN |
Word of the Day: Decimate.
THAT 11W DRIP. Here's everything you need to know about the Oklahoma Sooners:
- Buckeyes have not won a primetime home game against a non-conference Power 5 opponent in more than a decade.
- The battle between Oklahoma's offensive line and Ohio State's defensive line could decide the contest.
- Jamarco Jones cool with Oklahoma's offensive line getting all the attention.
- Oklahoma tight end Mark Andrews presents "a unique challenge."
- Ohio State will continue to deploy a five-man defensive front despite limited success against Indiana.
- Film Study: Baker Mayfield is the same quarterback Ohio State faced last year but he presents new challenges.
- Kevin Wilson says coaching against Oklahoma will be less awkward than Indiana.
- Look for Ohio State to wear special LBJ cleats.
- Shoe offering new beers, including Land Grant and Rhinegeist.
- Depth chart.
- VIDEO: Hyyyyyyyppppe trailer.
- Game poster.
Be sure to follow 11W, Dan Hope, Andrew Lind, and James Grega on Twitter for updates live from the Horseshoe.
IT'S A TRAP. Meyer said it best in the hype video — If somebody tries to come in your house and take something that doesn't belong to them, that's a fight they can't win.
Can't wait to see Meyer shove a dagger in Lincoln Riley's intestines during the postgame handshake and whisper, "Youngstown sends its regards" in his his ear.
SCORE PROPHECY: 42-27, Ohio State.
THOSE WMDs. Back when pizza hut was an experience... Chess is hard; life is harder... Hollywood's big bet on China is backfiring... The blind traveler... The school beneath the wave.
