Friday Skull Session

Another trip to Short North Gentrified Kroger, another parking spot ruined by a phantom grocery cart left by some slob who can't be troubled to take the cart back to its corral. One day, these criminals will be rounded up and exiled to Siberia, and our society will be all the stronger for it.

I look forward to that day.

URBAN MEYER CALL-IN RADIO SHOW INFO DUMP. Yesterday, the smallfolk called into Urban Meyer's radio show, and the reigning king of Ohio State football answered their queries. My former high school classmate/friend and current 11W beatwriter Kyle Rowland had y'all covered:

Wonder what Columbus drug dealer Urban has to ring up to secure "tough pills"?

MIKE GESICKI ROLLS NITTANY LION. The highly-touted tightend was scheduled to make his college decision later today, but last night, the New Jersey product decided to end his recruitment early. In the end, it came down to Penn State or Ohio State:

Damn. Damn. Damn. I think everyone here is a little disappointed, but I'm not going to bash a teenager for choosing to spend the prime of his life in State College, Pennsylvania. The decision obviously went a lot deeper than that. Hats off to Bill O'Brien, who obviously recruited his ass off if he beat out a guy like Urban Meyer. Until then, the search goes on for the mystical Ohio State tightend who routinely catches passes/is involved in the offense. 

Then there's Kirk Barton:

I hope this happens for the 'Bama fan Youtube videos.

COACHES WANT SOS FIGURED INTO PLAYOFF SELECTION. Coaches are right. Strength of schedule should be taken into consideration, especially since teams won't be required to go undefeated to make the title game. 

Here's what Mack Brown told USA TODAY (yes USA TODAY is still printing papers):

"I would like to see the component of strength of schedule so we can go back to seeing great teams playing each other out of conference across the country," Texas coach Mack Brown said. "I've always felt like that we need to get something in place that just doesn't have to do with a conference champion from a weaker conference or doesn't have to do with money. It has to do with pitting the best teams at the end of the year against each other.

"I don't think there's any doubt the goal of all of us is going to be to get in that four-team playoff and win it," Brown said. "So if you allow teams not to play a tough schedule, and get in the four-team playoff, it's going to be encouraging people not to play great games across the country."

It's cute Mack Brown thinks he'll be around to coach Texas in the College Football Playoffs, or if he is, that he will be able to lead Texas into the College Football Playoff. 

Speaking of a coach's demands, Nick Saban has a few:

OREGON FANS LOOKING AHEAD. These hustles are apparently being sold on Oregon's campus:

Honestly, I'm cool with Oregon and Alabama focusing on each other and the national media expecting that to be the title matchup. Don't mind the Buckeyes while they continue to chop wood. Definitely nothing special to see over here, Officer.

THOSE WMDs. Scrap Or Die (A great article on metal scrapping in Cleveland)... How the Feds took down Dread Pirate Roberts (hint: he was an idiot)... Mugged by a Mugshot Online... The Mercenary... The Man Who Lives Without Money... The Geeks on the Frontlines... Ohio DUI video confessor seeks reduced sentence... Ohio Man chose to smoke crack in a police station... 100% Pure IOWA... Standing while you work is way healthier than sitting... Oh gosh, tweens are now geo-tagging their selfies at funerals...