You know those dreams where one second you're on a pile of money and naked (wo)men and then the next you're awake and salty?
Jim Delany wasn't dreaming, y'all.
ICYMI: As reported by first by the Lord of Whispers of that ElevenWarriors dot com page (the competition was salty over this one): Ohio's top uncommitted prospect, Lorain County's Demario McCall, committed to the good guys on Saturday night. (Birm's full breakdown of Ohio State's big recruiting weekend is over here.)
I know recruiting isn't everyone's cup of Loko, and McCall can't make a play for the Buckeyes until the fall of 2016, but McCall's junior highlight reel is must-see:
Yeah, McCall will look crisp in the Buckeye regalia.
It's a shame he can't just forgo his senior year and enroll at Ohio State this summer. His talents are obviously on another level than anybody he's competing against on a regular basis.
From Chronicle.NorthCoastNow.com (via MN Buckeye):
Last year, he rushed 220 times for 2,302 yards — fourth best in Lorain County history and the best county performance in a 10-game season — and 35 touchdowns. He caught 14 passes for 195 yards and a touchdown, and he scored touchdowns on a kickoff return and an interception return.
McCall totaled 2,842 all-purpose yards during his junior season, finished with zero fumbles and had seven touchdowns — four of which were 50 yards or greater — called back due to penalties. He also set the county single-game rushing record with 445 yards against Elyria Catholic in Week 9.
McCall, by the way, is on Twitter.
"THERE IS NO SINGLE SLOBS." Further proof (from Dispatch.com) we needed that Slobhouse reality T.V. show yesterday:
“A ‘slob’ isn’t what you look like, a ‘slob’ is how you act, it’s what you are, it’s what you do,” [right tackle prospect Chase] Farris said. “We go eat, we slob. When we’re together in the meeting room, we slob. When we’re on the field, we slob.
“When we slob, we slob together. There’s no single slobs. It’s just a group of slobs.”
As left guard Billy Price explained, “A slob is an offensive lineman, a good offensive lineman. … We’re a very laid-back group. It’s a fun term to kind of throw around. It’s not demeaning, like ‘You’re fat,’ or ‘You’ve got a gut,’ or whatnot. It’s just … you’re a ‘slob.’”
Obviously, Happy Jamarco getting the starting right tackle gig would make me Happy Jamarco, but it seems Farris taking over Darryl Baldwin's spot is written in the stars.
I expect zero drop-off from Farris, a former four-star recruit, but it speaks to what a demanding position offensive line is that a senior of Farris' talent is just cracking the starting rotation.
Hopefully the young slobs stay patient.
RIGA ROLLS RUTGERS. Ohio State's baseball team rolled into New Jersey and left with the W.
From OhioStateBuckeyes.com:
PISCATAWAY, N.J. -- Ryan Riga was in the zone once again for the Buckeyes on Sunday. The senior lefty pitched a complete-game shutout to lead the Ohio State baseball team to a 1-0 series finale win over Rutgers at Bainton Field. The native of Fairfield, Ohio, Riga broke the Ohio State scoreless innings streak record during his shutout performance (29.0 IP), passing former Buckeye Bob Spears' 1995 mark of 22.1.
"Ryan Riga was A+ today," head coach Greg Beals said. "Our senior goes out and throws a gem for us and it was exactly what we needed. We were only able to get one run from the offense, but Riga was phenomenal."
With the victory, Ohio State improves to 18-7 overall and 4-2 in Big Ten play, while Rutgers falls to 8-15 and 3-3 in the conference after the second week of league play.
Imagine that: Rutgers is bad at baseball too. Very cool and good.
URBAN DOES LUNCH. How much would you listen to Urban Meyer speak... WHILE ALSO EATING FOOD? I'd pay a lot more than $23.
From CantonRep.com:
After a few weeks of going back and forth with Meyer’s schedule, the Pro Football Hall of Fame Luncheon Club organizers finally were able to get Meyer on the calendar. Ohio State’s football coach almost always stops by the club to speak.
Meyer will do so at noon Monday, which is a bit of an unusual time for the Buckeye head coach. Usually, the stop is before spring football, but Ohio State is in the middle of spring practice now.
Lunch starts being served at 11 a.m., with the program starting at 12:10 and wrapping up at 1 p.m. The lunch is open to members only (cost of a membership is $35) and cost of a meal for members is $13, or $23 for guests of members.
Hopefully Urban gets super juiced and takes a pot shot at Jim Harbaugh. You know the man has some #takes on his new rival. (That's something else for which I'd pay: Urban Meyer's unfiltered Harbaugh #hot #take. I'd bet $100 he's salivating over kicking his ass.)
BIG BEAR DITCHES THE MAN BUN. Important hair news:
RIP pic.twitter.com/sSkf3tztlu
— Joey Bosa (@jbbigbear) March 29, 2015
So far the guys hate and the girls like it ... Sorry guys
— Joey Bosa (@jbbigbear) March 29, 2015
Gotta love the guys that get upset about other guys' haircuts on the internet.
LIL NICKY'S CRUMBLING KINGDOM. Remember when it was a thing that Urban Meyer would bring a criminal organization into Columbus? Those were fun times.
Meanwhile, in the ashen wastes of Tuscaloosa:
Ugly weekend for Bama & Saban w/ repeat offenders. DB GenoSmith gets 2nd DUI & DL Jonathan Taylor gets arrested AGAIN for domestic violence.
— Bruce Feldman (@BruceFeldmanCFB) March 29, 2015
Shoutout to Alabama for originally using the classic PR technique of "well, actually, the perpetrator is the victim."
Here is a statement from Bamas AD that describes Taylors departure from Georgia using the word difficulties: pic.twitter.com/QU9HsaXvDW
— Holly Anderson (@HollyAnderson) March 29, 2015
I get that, outside of something criminally heinous, you can't wantonly dole out life sentences to 18-22-year-olds. Granting Taylor asylum, however, looked bad at the time and even worse now.
It's a definite black eye for one of America's premiere money and football factories.
I guess, though, those are the risks you're willing to take after getting eviscerated for 283 rushing yards on national television.
NOW THAT'S A TATTOO. "Tattoo Cartel" does a lot of work on Ohio State athletes (lame Tatgate jokes to the trashcan on the left, please), and this isn't on an OSU athlete, but it's still damned impressive:
I think the guy pulled it off. If I got a tat like that it'd look like a lumpy, malformed bra filled with burnt mashed potatoes.
DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A HUNT, REALLY. I'm no Easter Bunny, but I thought the whole thing was to hide the eggs and then make the kids go find them?
Coolest.Easter.Egg.Hunt.EVER!! Thanks @OhioStAthletics @Brutus_Buckeye #GoBucks #easterrules pic.twitter.com/PVswkDIzsP
— carri love (@carrilove1) March 29, 2015
Maybe the Easter Bunny is just counting down the days to retirement or fell off the wagon? (I'm just asking the questions nobody else will.)
THOSE WMDs. The Deadly Global War for Sand... One Professional Russian Troll Tells All... Gibraltar's first legitimate goal was scored by a cop... Thierry Henry's still got it... The best snooker player in the world is not very happy... An Itemized Marriage Proposal via Voice Mail.
