Skull Session: Keep Calm and Michigan Won't Make the Playoffs

Well, the first Saturday without Buckeye football since Sept. 24 is finally upon us. But before the season if somebody said, "Ohio State will be off championship weekend" most people probably would've imagined a worse scenario than a bye.

RELATED: BOW DOWN TO WASHINGTON.

And why shouldn't it be that way? Ohio State lost a game it should have won in the lair of thaumaturgy that is Happy Valley. The local team beat three top-10 teams, including the one of grown-ass Michigan Men led by a baby in a diaper.

Not bad for a team that lost 14 active NFL players. 

Let's turn to the slate:

Good thing a weak schedule made Virginia Tech overrated. Michigan can catch the local work if it wants, but Urban Meyer owes Dabo Swinney an L. I'm sick of my 2014 Orange Bowl shirt reminding me of that loss every time I wear it to the gym, which I must mention for my "workouts" to count.

Alabama will bodybag Florida. If the Gators go up 7-3 in the first quarter, their fans will want to take a photograph because the Tide freight train will be pulling out of the station.

My sources indicated Nick Saban's support staff spent Friday night putting plastic sheets around the Georgia Dome field to protect Tide fans from the blood, brain splatter, and other muscly sinew that will result in the butchery. That way DNA can't link them to the scene of the crime, and they won't have to testify against Nick Saban—should it ever come to that, which it won't.

As for the Big Ten's "we got hustled into this" championship, give me the Badgers. Not only because if the Nittany Lions win I have to stop slandering James Franklin until the next Ohio State win over Penn State, but also because I'm tired of watching them smoke and mirror victories from the confines of their remote Pennsylvania outpost.

If Wisconsin wins convincingly, look for the Badgers to leapfrog Michigan into the playoffs should Clemson falter.

Lastly, shoutout to two Ohio high school teams vying for state championships today. I back Minster, my adopted home away from home, to do the deed over Warren John F. Kennedy for the DVII 'ship.

In Div. III, I support Trotwood-Madison, coached by former Buckeye Jeff Graham, to beat Akron Archbishop Hoban. Apologies to former Ohio State commits Danny Clark and Todd Sibley Jr. It's not personal; it's Miami Valley business.

If there are other teams that need support, please comment below.

 J.T. REVIVAL SEASON. J.T. Barrett faced some criticism this year. Even from me, though once crunch time came he always gives OSU the best shot to win.

But now we have a lull in the season, the gurus finally assembled cases to show Barrett hasn't digressed. OSU fans elevated their expectations.

From theozone.net:

In this edition of Buckeye Breakdown: Experience Behind Center, we take a look at a sequence that illustrates what Barrett provides from the quarterback position. It doesn’t make the SportsCenter Top 10, but it keeps the offense on schedule.

The Buckeyes are in the mix for a National Championship with the youngest team in the country. Let that sink in, then admire the job J.T. Barrett has done with this team.

Here's the thing about the offense: Despite the struggles, whenever Ohio State gets the ball back, there's always hope (except on that last down against Penn State).

So if the defense keeps it close, the offense can break through at any moment. It's not the sexiest way to win, but we, fans of a team with over 40 freshmen, can't complain about the lack of style points this deep in the game. This season is house money from here on out.

 THE MARCH TO 8. It's going to be hilarious to watch the fans of schools left out of the playoffs whine. (Sorry y'all's brand sucks.)

The best timeline is Michigan. The worst timeline is Ohio State, though that won't happen. The committee learned last year when it left the local team out of the playoffs.

Whatever happens, there will be calls to expand the playoffs to eight teams.

From foxsports.com:

We’re two days, four major conference championship games and one Big 12-deciding rivalry game away from setting this year’s College Football Playoff. But while there’s still plenty to be sorted out between now and Sunday, the fact is that only two or three matchups from this weekend’s packed docket will have a measurable impact on which teams make up the committee’s final four.

It’s a shame, to say the least, that teams like Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Colorado, Florida and Virginia Tech will be playing for so much and so little at the same time, but that’s the reality of life with a four-team playoff — which, we should note, is better than no playoff at all. Still, it’s fair to wonder how the playoff (and this weekend) might make for more compelling theater with the benefit of the eight-team field that so many fans of the sport desire.

I'm with that. The FCS already plays a 24-team tournament, and it's amazing. People already watch things like the Potato Bowl, might as well add more games of actual consequence.

However, if there is an expansion, player compensation packages need to be restructured. At some point, you can't ask these kids men to play damn near an NFL schedule with school in exchange for school vouchers.

Jim Harbaugh made nine million dollars to finish third in his division. Kirk Ferentz made $4.5 million to finish 8-4 overall and 6-3 in the Big Ten West.

In 2015, Purdue purchased pyrotechnics for a noon game against Minnesota in October. The Boilermakers lost, 41-13, in front of 800 fans.

Brian Spurlock–USA TODAY Sports

Despite their book cooking, these programs ain't broke.

And no, I'm not calling for $100,000 million contracts for players, though I wouldn't object because Demario McCall would be worth every penny and instantly become the coolest millionaire on Earth.

But expansion will happen, and it will be because of money. Would Oklahoma win the title? Probably not, but millions of people would watch an opening round Alabama–Oklahoma game in Bryant-Denny Stadium. I would literally sell a kidney to watch Alabama play in Ohio Stadium in late December or early January.

Look how quickly the BCS grifters switched sides once they did the simple math and realized a playoff would make them more money. At some point, the wealth needs to be shared with the men risking bodily harm.

 MAKES YOU THINK. Some may not think it's true. So this paints a better picture than anything my self-righteous ramblings could.

Bowl executives are actively rooting against future servicemen because it will mess up their bowl money gravy trains.

From espn.com:

"I don't want to be un-American," one bowl official said, "but nearly everyone in the bowl industry, quite frankly, is rooting against Navy."

That official technically isn't rooting against Navy, just what happens if Navy wins. That's because if Navy wins the American and is in contention for the Group of 5 bid in a New Year's Six bowl, the College Football Playoff selection committee could delay announcing the highest-ranked Group of 5 champion team until Dec. 10 when Navy plays Army, six days after its final rankings are revealed.

The domino effect on other bowls could "paralyze" the system, a source said.

Respect to Temple, but I'm going to need Navy to hang 40 on the Owls today and hope the bowls' alternative schemes fall apart.

 #PERTINENTWIRE. Sorry for preaching. We now return to the local broadcast.

Here is Urban Meyer, playing D'Angelo Barksdale, explaining chess to two padawans, Paul Chryst (Wallace) and James Franklin (Bodie Broadus):

PREDICTION: Local team hit a shortcut. Hold your playoff celebrations until Sunday if you want, but not me. I'm enjoying this glorious day.

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