Notre Dame is the first college football team you decide to either love or hate.
The Fighting Irish are the inaugural lesson in exercising your reign over Saturday's protagonist/antagonist dynamic. Growing up in Ohio you're told Michigan is the bad guy. There's no decision to be made; it's doctrine. A few souls slip through the cracks but most of the state's population ends up getting it right.
But no one tells you how or what to think of Notre Dame. That's up to you.
Brian Kelly chanting in We Are ND by Freekbass.
It's a path of self-discovery not restricted to citizens of Irish descent, Catholic upbringing or an Indiana zip code either. Geography is meaningless - even people who live in South Bend have no idea where South Bend is. The Irish are alongside the Duke Blue Devils, Dallas Cowboys and New York Yankees as America's omnipotent sports clubs in 2015.
Which means Notre Dame may hold rank as your other team (more on that in a bit) or it might be that one whose crippling losses fuel your spirit. It's a program that incites strong feelings everywhere which is to say it is a program of national significance. The opposite of love is not hate.
I have the same measured admiration for Notre Dame that I hold for Michigan State, as they're the two programs who also elevate the importance of beating Ohio State's arch-rival to the nearest altitude. We share a common, local enemy. But Notre Dame is also the easiest blueblood to make fun of in all of American sports that doesn't have a cackling cartoon emperor fervidly ripping it apart from the inside.
Polygamy is alive and well in college football, and Notre Dame is America's mistress.
There's just so much to cherish and appreciate about Notre Dame football. Polygamy is alive and well in college football, and Notre Dame is America's mistress. But that affair comes at a cost:
PRO: Undeniably classic game day, helmet, uniform and tradition. Notre Dame football is what you show aliens who arrive on earth and need a good reason not to plan an October Saturday wedding. On paper, and oftentimes throughout history, it is flawless.
CON: No storied program beats itself with the ugly uNiFoRmZ stick as violently or unnecessarily as Notre Dame does.
PRO: Thoughtfully embracing and celebrating Irish heritage via leprechaun mascot, Victory Clog, Celtic Chant and Rakes of Mallow among other traditions. Its authenticity is the antidote to two dozen teams all calling themselves Wildcats or Tigers.
Rapping Leprechaun from We Are ND by Freekbass.
CON: Catholics vs. Convicts, Criminoles, Cousins and whatever it chooses for Ohio State if anything are all so delightfully tone deaf.
CON: Rudy and the syrupy romanticizing of Notre Dame football both real and contrived.
PRO: Notre Dame unveiled its 2022-23 series with Ohio State the same week its series with Michigan was ending just to poke Dave Brandon in the eye. All is eternally forgiven. Go ahead and make Rudy 2.
PRO: Its best players are forever unforgotten. ND's stars become legends of the sport. It's one of its unique perks.
CON: Manti T'eo. The equally-unblunted side of that legend sword.
PRO: Knute Rockne. American football's most renown coach.
CON: Charlie Weis, who has been paid more in 2015 by Notre Dame than Rockne earned in his entire coaching career, even adjusting for inflation.
PRO: The ubiquitous fight song, which is lifted and repurposed by other schools at all levels throughout the country. My daughter's NJ elementary school's fight song melody is Notre Dame Victory March but the lyrics have been changed to be about dolphins and recess.
COUNTERPOINT: Freekbass.
Ohio State's bowl opponent is a global team that plays a national schedule and carries a worldwide following. I have an uncle who identifies as a Clemson and Notre Dame fan. My neighbor across the street hangs Auburn and Notre Dame flags. Living in New Jersey I know way too many individual Penn State and Notre Dame fans.
Ohio State's current head football coach - and Notre Dame's most beloved and visible former one - also reside in this category. They love both. They've also been employed by both.
Yup, every pic here is from that Freekbass video.
I'm not here to judge how lame that is for the rest of us but what this means - in this buildup to Glendale - is there are Buckeyes among us who will quietly root against their 1B team on New Year's Day knowing a silver lining awaits should Ohio State fall short. This stems from that protagonist/antagonist dynamic you dealt with in your early years.
No one tells you how or what to think of Notre Dame. Some people simply choose spread their passion around.
But whether you loathe the Fighting Irish, confidently keep them as your other team or openly maintain split loyalties, you can find peace in the realization that Ohio State and Notre Dame fans have far more in common with each other than we have differences: We're all passionate lifers where college football is concerned, we routinely live and revel in past glory, we all share an unhealthy amount of contempt for Michigan and virtually none of us attended Notre Dame.
It's almost like looking in a mirror. Some of us just choose to see two reflections.
