Nebraska gets a second-straight Homecoming game Saturday in Columbus.
The Cornhuskers were just humiliated in Bloomington, which if you're an old head is absolutely surreal. If you went back in time 25 years and told a mid-1990s human person that Indiana chose Nebraska as its Homecoming opponent, you'd get a funny look - partially because meeting a time-traveling college football genie would be incredible.
But mostly because the only program that won more games than Nebraska (108) during the 1990s was Florida State (109). Homecoming opponents are intended to be easy wins for the alumni to enjoy, and Indiana has reliably been no better than a five-win team ever since it picked up football only to pass the time between basketball seasons.
The Hoosiers won 47 games in the 1990s and 48 in the 1980s, or like 40% of what Nebraska was used to. They sucked last year and finally fired their terrible coach. It took less than one season for IU to reach a performance level Nebraska has been chasing ever since it fired Frank Solich for only winning 9.7 games a year.
As for that time-traveling college football genie, I would ask it to pay a visit to Senior Year Troy Smith and gently advise him to avoid fast food during bowl prep. That's just one of my requests if this mystical visitor ever shows itself to - I've got a whole list prepared. We can discuss it during the offseason.
Perhaps the Hoosiers' revival can remind the Buckeyes how fun *Just winning* can feel when you're not obsessed with perfection.
Anyway, Indiana now fills its stadium with red clothing, a feat which historically required Ohio State visiting on what was - there are no coincidences, folks - Memorial Stadium Picture Day. IU doesn't need any help doing that this season, as they absolutely destroyed the Buckeyes' next opponent, earning Bloomington its first ESPN College Gameday appearance since an odd Thursday nighter back in 2017.
The Hoosiers are the story of the college football season's first half. That program hasn't been able to consistently shake its stubborn commitment to losing for a half-century - and before you ask about if this is sustainable, that's anxiety for another day. Indiana is required to enjoy what's happening right now and live in the moment.
This is just IU's third seven-win season in 30 years, and it still has at least five games left to play. Perhaps the Hoosiers' revival can remind the Buckeyes how fun just winning can feel when you're not continually obsessed with perfection. Ohio State wins all the damn time, but we force ourselves to be consumed by everything that wasn't perfect.
IU's turnaround is truly inspired, though not unique. It's the second B1G program in recent years to make an abrupt U-turn toward formidability, using a proven head coach, youthful assistants, a roster full of veterans and a strong foundation hellbent on both competitive excellence and shaking off years of humiliation.
The other B1G program did all of that too, plus some other stuff. The NCAA should be ruling on that stuff just in time for Christmas shopping season - as for Indiana's latest victim, it will find itself in another hostile sea of red on Saturday. It's not stadium picture day, but it is another Homecoming.
We've got ourselves a Scarlet-Out! And also, it's Eleven Dubgate weekend! Let's get Situational.
OPENER | HARDBOILED AND HARD LUCK
Oct 12, 2024; Eugene, Oregon, USA; Ohio State Buckeyes quarterback Will Howard (18) hands off to running back Quinshon Judkins (1) during the first half at Autzen Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Troy Wayrynen-Imagn Images
Ohio State's availability reports have been a bit of an adventure since pandemic governance required B1G programs to contact trace its players and coaches prior to them slamming bodies with each other in empty stadiums.
As a result, a lot of guys - including the head coach once - were abruptly isolated from the games they were able to play. This produced Saturday morning availability reports, which unlike the precautionary interventions of 2020 are still with us.
Since then, the Buckeyes fans have gotten quite a few surprises when those game day dispatches list names of unavailable players who showed no signs of injury. The program has effectively used this instrument, still in place since 2020 to be a little sneaky with injuries.
Tyliek Williams and Donovan Jackson are recent examples. Jaxson Smith-Njigba is the example.
If you find these Saturday morning surprises irritating, you're probably not thinking hard enough about the other side of what we've witnessed in this span. Last year Emeka Egbuka's production and non-receiving efficacy slipped because, we were told, he was playing hurt (this isn't a conspiracy, he was injured all year and briefly showed up on a Saturday morning report).
Egbuka is exceptional at full health - he only needed half a season to surpass his total 2023 yardage and touchdown totals. Last year - after the Notre Dame game - he was clearly not himself when he was active. Did the 2023 Buckeyes have any promising younger receivers who might have benefited from and exploited those reps? It's rhetorical.
Cade Stover couldn't get off the field in either of his final two seasons, playing through lingering injuries which may or may not have caused him to miscalculate or outright whiff on an innumerable volume of critical blocking assignments.
If THE BUCKEYES didn't learn ANYTHING from what Michigan exploited for three miserable years, then they'll never learn.
Tommy Eichenberg played with two broken hands in 2022 and last season in Ann Arbor he was playing with one arm dangling off of his body. Michigan, elite in both traditional and unconventional scouting - ran entire drives directed at Eichenberg as any good team that spots a weakness should. Ohio State graciously provided that weakness.
Eighty-five guys on a football roster. Forcing the broken, trusted ones to play is a choice.
And that brings us to Quinshon Judkins, whose hand was rumored to be injured leading into the Oregon game. Spotters watched him enter the stadium and didn't see any wrap or padding that indicated an injury. Then he got into the game on Ohio State's second drive.
Duck defenders tried to strip the ball on his first carry, which went for no gain. On his second carry they went right at his hands again - this time, ripping the ball away from him. This week Judkins underwent a hand procedure, all of which indicates the hand rumors were true. Day denied his hand health played any role in the fumble, but Oregon sure seemed to think it was a vulnerability.
Why was Judkins playing with his hand in that condition, especially when this staff has a history of being precautionary with other guys? Stover was the only tight end they trusted well that's a coaching and recruiting problem, and you're Ohio State.
Tommy was the only linebacker they trusted well, ibid. TreVeyon Henderson started the Oregon game. Playing Judkins at all was a luxury that evening, and Ohio State ended up paying a luxury tax when he fumbled.
Let's twist it further - this isn't a debate over who is injured and who is merely hurt. Seeing how the Ducks went right at Judkins is a reminder Ohio State's coaching staff absolutely doesn't need: There are no secrets in college football. None. Zero.
Every team is constantly under attack by hackers looking for vulnerability. Oregon knew Judkins could be shaky in his condition. It knew Burke could be had from watching tape. Larry Johnson's defensive line strategy has been on film for 30 years, that can be hacked if you have the right guys to do it.
Opposing coaches face a roster like Ohio State's and they aren't going to choose to pick on its strength, they're going to go all-in on exploiting its weaknesses. Cameron Martinez entered the 2022 Michigan game and the Wolverines went right at him, because they knew he was a weak link.
Last year freshman Malik Horford entered The Game and they went right at him. Touchdown, Michigan.
You can have a debate about playing injured players who should not be kept off the field under any circumstance, but if you believe for a millisecond that Ohio State's premier opponents aren't going to seize on the opportunity to beat up on an injured or average guy, you might just be blocking out how this team loses, every time it loses.
This staff should hide its setbacks better. And its play calls. And its intentions. If they didn't learn from what Michigan exploited for three miserable years, they never will.
INTERMISSION
The Solo
The last time we had to tolerate the unforgivable phrase Defending National Champion Michigan Wolverines it was following the 1997 season. This year, intermissions will pay homage to that cursed year's Billboard Hot 100.
Exciting stuff in the Horseshoe this Saturday, comrades - the first commitment of Ohio State's 2024 recruiting class will be starting his first game in the stadium. Dylan Raiola hasn't been to town since he was the future of the Buckeyes' QB room, so this is his first crack at playing in what might have been home.
Raiola is the Huskers' prized freshman, our segue into this week's intermission which is a song about a love triangle. It includes a gritty moaning solo. Let's answer our two questions.
Is the musician in the video actually moaning grittily?
The Verve Pipe's lead singer Brian Vander Ark does all the grunting here. In 1997, every guy wearing a Goo Goo Dolls haircut (there's a formal descriptor but I don't know what it is) and sporting a flavor savor (that little hair merkin that queefcore bros grow below their bottom lips; a soul patch requires soul) was required and expected to produce noises like this.
Vander Ark wasn't being artistic. He was simply following the rule of law. VERDICT: Yes, definitive.
does this gritty moaning solo slap?
It's difficult to issue an objective verdict this week. Saxophones are universally beloved. Guitar solos are their own religion and everyone's invited. Harmonicas are provocative. Dudes moaning is a niche solo category.
I can only speak for me. Dudes moaning while sealing off edge rushers? Good, if it's my team's offense. Dudes moaning at the gym? Bad, do not enjoy. Dude moans leaking into your hotel room at 2:17am due to thin walls? Bad, change rooms ASAP. Emanating from a hospital? Bad, also sad.
From a doctor while receiving your annual physical? Bad. While looking for your car in a dimly-lit parking garage? Bad. In the middle of an otherwise banger song? VERDICT: Does not slap.
The Bourbon
There is a bourbon for every situation. Sometimes the spirits and the events overlap, which means that where bourbon is concerned there can be more than one worthy choice.
Law's Four-Grain Bonded. Good all by itself.
Nebraska has been B1G since The Situational debuted, which makes it a chronic pain in the ass where bourbon guidance is concerned. All that corn in that state - it's literally the team's mascot - and they are decidedly mediocre at distilling.
Their deficiency is a big part of the evolution of this section, which originally made state of origin an important factor. Colorado is one state away and is a top-five whiskey producer, and better water is only part of the reason. Nebraska only beats Colorado in football/
Law's Four Grain is Colorado's first bonded bourbon. It absolutely cleans up in whiskey competitions, actually exists (you can buy it online!) and is a premium-adjacent four grainer well suited to welcome you back to emotionally vested football following a second Ohio State bye week.
The only mistake you can make with it is comparing L4GB to Colonel Taylor Four Grain on account of their shared quaternary tendencies. Don't do that, even if that's what Law's probably wants you to do.
Taylor probably uses the infamous, mysterious Buffalo Trace Mash Bill 1, which isn't an accident. Since recipe is a fraction of the journey, they have a miniscule chance of matching up. And L4GB is not CT4G, because nothing is. What L4GB is though, is perfectly serviceable.
It is citrusy on the nose, I got lentils and light clove on the palate - and then the exact type of smooth finish you should expect from any whiskey with only a hint of rye in it. Don't pay over $100.
CLOSER | HOW TO SURVIVE HISTORY
Oct 19, 1985; Columbus, OH, USA; FILE PHOTO; Ohio State Buckeyes receiver Cris Carter runs with the ball against the Purdue Boilermakers at Ohio Stadium. The Buckeyes beat the Boilermakers 41-27. Mandatory Credit: Malcolm Emmons- Imagn Images
Chances are you're a little rusty again coming off another Ohio State bye week, so here's a reminder that Cris Carter has held Ohio State's all-time freshman TD receptions record (8) for 40 years.
It's relevant because Jeremiah Smith has eight touchdowns already, with one of those coming on the ground in East Lansing. That means his next TD reception will tie a program record entering its fifth decade.
Smith has scored in every game of his college career, which if that continues would be a record for the sport. Prior to the Iowa game, I heard a fan in the Varsity Club courtyard suggest to his group of friends that Smith is basically if Cris Carter had a son who played football at Ohio State.
It was a hell of a thing to say out loud. If brain fog is confusing you, Carter already had a son who played at Ohio State. This was a heavily promoted and celebrated happening, at least when Duron showed up on campus. Like His Dad, But Taller was how we all packaged it.
That Varsity Club bro wasn't completely far off - Duron and Jeremiah, at least from the outset, was similar. Both shined at respective South Florida football factories - Duron at St. Thomas Aquinas and Jeremiah at Chaminade-Madonna.
They both arrived in Columbus at 6'3" with severe mismatch potential (Duron grew two more inches during what would have been his college years). And these similarities end right around now, midseason of their freshman years.
Duron's amateur run concluded with his father begging NFL teams to take a chance on him, saying his son's only problem was "he hates (bleeping) school." After flunking out of Ohio State, he went to Coffeyville CC in Kansas, Alabama and FAU. He didn't accumulate any FBS statistics beyond his 2009 season in Columbus - 13 catches, one touchdown.
Jeremiah surpassed Duron's career production during the Marshall game and will pass Cris as soon as this Saturday. Thus far, he has been the model for how elite talent should treat the opportunities the Ohio State football program offers. Duron is the cautionary tale. They're both valuable and instructive lessons.
Thanks for getting Situational today. Go Bucks. Beat Nebraska. See you at Eleven Dubgate XII this Saturday prior to the game!
